Gizmodo: Stupidity

Moron Kid Gets Trapped Inside a Crane Game, Still Doesn't Get a Prize

matt buchanan — Thu, 17 Apr 2008 19:30:00 EDT

I'm pretty sure when I was young, kids this dumb were sent out into the wild and only allowed back into society after they'd done battle with rabid wolves and survived, to ensure accordance with Darwin's law. Anyways, look kid, the crappy, Chinese-made stuffed toys inside, they're not actually worth it—not the quarter you conned out of your parents to play, and not the years of therapy you're going to have undergo to get over this. If it had been one of the ones where you can win like a Wii, okay, 'cause they can still be kind of hard to come by. But it totally wasn't. [YouTube via Geekologie]

Rocket Bike Will Scorch the Earth, Possibly Your Most Sensitive Areas

Adam Frucci — Tue, 30 Oct 2007 11:25:01 EDT

Because traveling is just more fun when open flames are involved, the BVSA Rocket Bike exists. Created by Jason Broemmel so that he could jump across Islais Creek in San Francisco for a bike rodeo (yes, a bike rodeo. What a country.), this bad boy is powered by highway flares, illegal fireworks, propane, and danger. And just in case you felt like trying to jump Islais Creek yourself, be warned: he didn't make the jump. [Ubergizmo]

Solid Gold 2008 Calendar for Clueless Rich Fucks

Charlie White — Fri, 19 Oct 2007 10:58:22 EDT

If you're going to put a 2008 calendar on your wall, might as well spend $257,000 on one made of solid gold, right? An opportunistic Tokyo jeweler hops on the soak-the-rich bandwagon for the second year in a row with this 26.3-inch-tall calendar that consists of 13.23 pounds of 24k gold. How ostentatious can you get, with an object that's so obviously disposable? Well, if you had a few billion dollars, what's $257,000 among friends? Attention, rich people with no brains: instead of literally throwing your money away on a nitwit item such as this, put that cash to work for the betterment of womankind. It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month, and you could buy pink Zunes from Warriors in Pink and pass them out to 1028 of your closest friends, with 100% of that money going to save boobies! Let's see ... save human beings, or buy a solid gold calendar? You decide. [Spluch]

Xbox 360 Thief Calls Tech Support, Gets Caught

Jason Chen — Thu, 08 Feb 2007 18:50:15 EST

What's the first thing you would do if you stole an Xbox 360 but forgot to grab the power supply? If you answered "call Microsoft tech support and give them my full contact information", you're probably in a jail in Wellington, New Zealand right now. – Jason Chen

Microsoft privacy defence delays police [Stuff via Kotaku]