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Happy 100th Birthday To The Toaster
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Lite: hates Illinois Nazis
03/31/09

In reply to Happy 100th Birthday To The Toaster

Yeah toast!
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OMG! Ponies!
03/31/09

In reply to Happy 100th Birthday To The Toaster
Toaster Day recipes:

BLT:

4 rashers of crisp bacon, split cross-wise

3 slices beefsteak tomato

4 leaves of romaine lettuce

2 slices of white bread

Hellman's mayonnaise

Toast bread. Spread mayonnaise on bread. Stack lettuce, then tomato, then bacon on bottom slice, lining up where the sandwich will be cut in half. Put top slice on and cut cross-wise. Serve with a pickle spear.

Latchkey Grilled Cheese.

4 slices of processed American cheese (Velveeta or Kraft)

2 slices of white bread

Softened butter

1 can Campbell's Tomato Soup

Toast bread. While toasting bread, begin warming up soup. Spread butter on toast. Layer cheese slices on bread, leaving a little bit of room on margins. Microwave on high for 20 seconds. Cut diagonal. Serve with tomato soup.

Both sandwiches are best eaten while playing video games.
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timak
03/31/09

@OMG! Ponies!: non grilled grilled cheese? blasphemy!
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OMG! Ponies!
03/31/09

@timak: It's called "Latchkey Grilled Cheese" because us latchkey kids learned to zap up grilled cheese sandwiches in the microwave.

@michaelportent: Put the bowl of soup on the floor beside you. It's assumed that you're sitting Indian-style on the floor, about 4 feet from the TV, which is the ideal way to play Legend of Zelda.
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OMG! Ponies!
03/31/09

In reply to Happy 100th Birthday To The Toaster
First of all, sliced bread is not much of an invention. The bread slicer - that's a great invention. And, while toast is great, the toaster is one of man's crowning achievements.

Why do I like toast? Because it combines bread with fire. And the resulting toast is greater than the sum of its parts because it can carry soft butter and simultaneously be used as sop for egg yolk. And, of course, as stated, where there's toast there is also bacon.

Lest we forget, bacon and toast are not just breakfast. They are half of one of the greatest sandwiches of all - the mighty BLT. Toasted white bread with a smattering of mayonnaise, carrying beefsteak tomato, crisp romaine lettuce, and crispy, warm, salty bacon. The merging of flavors, textures, sounds, and temperatures in such a simple form is unrivaled in the culinary world.

To toast! To bacon! To sandwiches! To tomatoes! To lunch!
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Aunt_Snowman
03/31/09

@OMG! Ponies!: I have to disagree with your choice of beefsteak tomato. It's simply too juicy, and that threatens the crunch integrity of the toast and, dare I say, the bacon. Of course, you could separate the tomato from the bread with the lettuce layer, but ideally you want a little of the tomato to blend with the mayo, and I think mayo on bread next to tomato is ideal.

I recommend using a roma tomato. Just as delicious, a little meatier, a lot less juicy.

I think about sandwiches a lot.
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OMG! Ponies!
03/31/09

@Aunt_Snowman: Remove the seed goop first. Most of the moisture comes from that goop and it adds no real flavor.
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redman042
03/31/09

@OMG! Ponies!: Damn, you guys need your own show on the Food Network. I just ate lunch and you're already making me hungry again!
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OMG! Ponies!
03/31/09

@redman042: I've been tempted to. I thought that Rev 3 was going to do a cooking show called "Ctrl-Alt-Chicken" but that was about the time I swore off Digg and Diggnation.

Thanks for reminding me that I've been slacking on my blogging duties.
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ripfire
03/31/09

In reply to Happy 100th Birthday To The Toaster
**Toast** **Toast!** **TOAST!!**

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Nick
03/31/09

In reply to Happy 100th Birthday To The Toaster
i like the next iteration with the toaster oven. that bad boy makes toast and cooks whatever will fit in it.
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strider_mt2k
03/31/09

In reply to Happy 100th Birthday To The Toaster
Here's to ya, Toast!
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Kaiser-Machead
03/31/09

In reply to Happy 100th Birthday To The Toaster
Pop Tarts don't hold a candle to toaster strudel. The Pillsbury Doughboy is the confection equivalent of Jabba the Hut. He'll feed you to his fuckin' rancor if you don't buy his shit.
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92BuickLeSabre
03/31/09

@Kaiser-Machead: You know that commercial where they say Pop Tarts don't hold a candle to toaster strudel?

I have to admit, it's one of the most convincing commercials ever. Watching the kids break open the flaky strudel crust...it makes me never want to eat another pop tart again.
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Kaiser-Machead
03/31/09

@92BuickLeSabre: Agreed. When I finally bought some, I cracked it open like in the commercial, and wept.

I didn't actually weep, but I was thinking about it.
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92BuickLeSabre
03/31/09

@Kaiser 'Overlord' Machead: Was it as good as they promised?

If you say yes, I may weep with delight myself.

If you say no, I may weep over the unnecessary hole that I've been carrying in my life.
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Kaiser-Machead
03/31/09

@92BuickLeSabre: Actually, it's much better. Pop tarts taste like loose particle board with cheap fruit preserve by comparison.
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stryder100
03/31/09

In reply to Happy 100th Birthday To The Toaster
Yumm. I wonder when peanut butter's birthday is.
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92BuickLeSabre
03/31/09

@stryder100: Given that peanut butter is older (and arguably much older) than toast, one wonders what they hell people were putting their peanut butter on?
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Gann
03/31/09

@92BuickLeSabre: I would wager peanut butter is older than toasters, but not toast, and definitely not older than bread (which is almost as good a peanut butter canvas as toast). Or apples. I love me some peanut butter on apple slices.
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92BuickLeSabre
03/31/09

@Gann and Guy_Whitey_Corngood: Your arguments involve things happening without gadgets making them happen.

This confuses my modern mind.

But I am certain there were no apples in the western hemisphere, when people were first eating peanut butter.

I guess it's possible they ate it on corn cakes, but that seems a little difficult to believe.

@IcemanD: Remember that time Chimalpopoca's friends were throwing a surprise party for him? Oh man, he never could live that down!
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Kaiser-Machead
01/26/09

In reply to The Toaster that Longed to Be a VCR
Come on. Single layer format? I require toast like I require ________, in pairs.
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frigg
01/26/09

In reply to The Toaster that Longed to Be a VCR
A toaster that only makes one piece of toast at a time is an insidious weapon designed to quietly subvert the very fabric of our sandwich-based society.
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KhaiJB
01/26/09

In reply to The Toaster that Longed to Be a VCR
Anyone for Toast?

Hot buttered toast!

[uk]
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OMG! Ponies!
01/26/09

In reply to The Toaster that Longed to Be a VCR
The only way to justify the cost is if it will toast your bread with little spool windows on it.

Also, there are some other things that I'm wondering:

If I want darker toast, do I switch it from SP to SLP? Will my bread now have late fees? Will the toaster blink 12:00 endlessly?
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frigg
01/26/09

@OMG! Ponies!: Also, when your toast pops out, there's a little sticker attached to it that says, mysteriously, "be kind, rewind; and by rewind, I mean if you're not going to eat me, scrape off all my exterior toasted bits, rehydrate my remaining bread fragment, and return me to a loosely sealed plastic bag, so that someone else will have the pleausre of transforming my pliable, yeasted, doughy self into a hot rigid board of toasted delight."
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Jrsy Devil's Advocate®
01/26/09

@OMG! Ponies!: +1
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Jrsy Devil's Advocate®
01/26/09

@OMG! Ponies!: And only your kid can program it..
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Curves
01/26/09

In reply to The Toaster that Longed to Be a VCR
One slot? I hope its at least one of the double sized one for 2 slices of toast, otherwise, piece #1 will be cold by the time #2 is done and would have to go back in to re-warm, creating a vicious cycle of cold toast.
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Curves was starred Curves was unstarred

Jrsy Devil's Advocate®
01/26/09

@Curves: Seems like it's long enough to fit two pieces in the one slot, instead of them sitting separately, side-by-side.
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MrBlahBlah
01/05/09

In reply to Roxio Toast 10 Titanium Burns Media, Streams to iPhone, Transfers Video Files to Your Tivo
woah...too many features for me to process.
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GitEmSteveDave_RockinLabCoat
01/05/09

In reply to Roxio Toast 10 Titanium Burns Media, Streams to iPhone, Transfers Video Files to Your Tivo
But wait, there's more. It slices, dices, chop, purees, and even rotisseries chickens. How much would you pay for such a product? But where not done. If you order within the next 20 minutes, b/c we can't do this all day, we'll toss in free, at no charge besides shipping and handling, box-e, the next generation in storage products!
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