@OMG! Ponies!: The new must-have action figure this Christmas, from GizToys... "Angry Double-fistin' Jesus!" Get yours at Wal-Mart this Black Friday! #handwrench
Can be used as/to:
1.) Animate all mechanical objects upon contact
2.) Look like a fish with a humongous eye
3.) An IUD
4.) A Fusion Reactor
5.) An Intergalactic spacecraft
6.) Lube
7.) A Lanyard Hole
1. occupies physical space
2. carries a measurable mass
3. holds certain properties
4. persists in time
5. can serve as an object of experience
6. can be used for self-instrumentation (including nose picking)
7. lanyard attachment #gerbershard
1. Philips head screw driver
2. Flat head screw driver
3. Glass breaker
4. Wire stripper
5. Pry bar
6. Nail puller
7. Bottle opener
There's my guess on the 7 functions. My guess on the flat head screw driver is a little iffy looks like the pry bar end may or may not have a flat head on there. All I know is that I want one. #gerbershard
1. Bottle opener
2. Nail remover
3. um... oh! A wire stripper
4. jeez... uh.. a pokie end.. for poking...
5. Also..hrm.. (let's see.. 3 more..) a Large hole for placement of round pegs.
6. ???
7. Profit! #gerbershard
Let's see:
I can get through security with a pen.
I can write things with a pen.
I can shank the stewardess with a pen.
I can blind defenders by stabbing their eyeballs out with a pen.
TSA doesn't care if I have 1 pen or 50 pens.
I can strangle someone with a cat5 cable.
I can subdue folk with zip ties.
I can carry an LED flashlight bright enough to blind people that doubles as a fist pack.
I can put that same flashlight in a sock to use as a sap.
Please don't get me started on how ridiculous this thing is along with TSA's rules for our safety. #gerbershard
@mr_bigglesworth: The proper response when they fondle your fleshlight is: "I'm sorry, if I'd known you'd be playing with it I'd have washed it first." #gerbershard
11/12/09
Also: I wonder what the shape of a jackhammer would be like... #handwrench
11/12/09
11/12/09
11/12/09
You imagine fisting the commenters.
Why am I not surprised #handwrench
11/12/09
Double fisting, nonetheless. #handwrench
11/12/09
11/12/09
10/30/09
* Lanyard hole
* Pry Bar
* Small Driver
* Wire Stripper
* Medium Driver
* Bottle Opener
* Cross Driver #gerbershard
10/30/09
Everyone knows the shard only has one purpose. #gerbershard
10/30/09
10/30/09
10/29/09
1.) Animate all mechanical objects upon contact
2.) Look like a fish with a humongous eye
3.) An IUD
4.) A Fusion Reactor
5.) An Intergalactic spacecraft
6.) Lube
7.) A Lanyard Hole
10/29/09
10/29/09
2. carries a measurable mass
3. holds certain properties
4. persists in time
5. can serve as an object of experience
6. can be used for self-instrumentation (including nose picking)
7. lanyard attachment #gerbershard
10/29/09
1. Philips head screw driver
2. Flat head screw driver
3. Glass breaker
4. Wire stripper
5. Pry bar
6. Nail puller
7. Bottle opener
There's my guess on the 7 functions. My guess on the flat head screw driver is a little iffy looks like the pry bar end may or may not have a flat head on there. All I know is that I want one. #gerbershard
10/29/09
I've got almost the exact thing but it has an x-acto blade on it. Won't let me take that on a plane. #gerbershard
10/29/09
2. Nail remover
3. um... oh! A wire stripper
4. jeez... uh.. a pokie end.. for poking...
5. Also..hrm.. (let's see.. 3 more..) a Large hole for placement of round pegs.
6. ???
7. Profit! #gerbershard
10/29/09
I can get through security with a pen.
I can write things with a pen.
I can shank the stewardess with a pen.
I can blind defenders by stabbing their eyeballs out with a pen.
TSA doesn't care if I have 1 pen or 50 pens.
I can strangle someone with a cat5 cable.
I can subdue folk with zip ties.
I can carry an LED flashlight bright enough to blind people that doubles as a fist pack.
I can put that same flashlight in a sock to use as a sap.
Please don't get me started on how ridiculous this thing is along with TSA's rules for our safety. #gerbershard
10/29/09
10/29/09
(Bonus points if you can name the quote!!) #gerbershard
10/29/09
I'm just very aware of what I carry that can be used as a weapon is all. #gerbershard
10/29/09
wait....were still talkin bout the same thing right? #gerbershard
10/29/09
10/29/09
10/29/09
10/29/09