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New York, 6:31 AM
Thu Nov 12
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  • posts about #tools more →

    OK, What 7 Things Can The Gerber Shard Multitool Do?

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    Dsmvwl  Admin  Promote to frontpage Approve user Ban user ×
    Image of mrbofus mrbofus
    10/30/09

    In reply to OK, What 7 Things Can The Gerber Shard Multitool Do?
    From Gerber's website:

    * Lanyard hole
    * Pry Bar
    * Small Driver
    * Wire Stripper
    * Medium Driver
    * Bottle Opener
    * Cross Driver #gerbershard
     Reply
    fuchikoma promoted this comment mrbofus was starred mrbofus was unstarred
    Image of Brodka: regrettably Brodka: regrettably
    10/30/09

    In reply to OK, What 7 Things Can The Gerber Shard Multitool Do?

    Everyone knows the shard only has one purpose. #gerbershard
     Reply
    fuchikoma promoted this comment Brodka: regrettably was starred Brodka: regrettably was unstarred
    Image of kentsmithnz kentsmithnz
    10/30/09

    In reply to OK, What 7 Things Can The Gerber Shard Multitool Do?
    Fishing line sinker, paper weight, land mine shrapnel, gravity tester, phone dialler, holder of keyring holders, coffee stirrer. #gerbershard
     Reply
    N@tedog promoted this comment kentsmithnz was starred kentsmithnz was unstarred
    Image of N@tedog N@tedog
    10/30/09

    @kentsmithnz: Divot remover, sibling annoyer, zit popper, tire slasher, magnet attractor, hymen buster, expensive vehicle scratcher, falling while in pocket thigh jabber. #gerbershard
     Reply
    N@tedog was starred N@tedog was unstarred
    Image of Duckspwn Duckspwn
    10/29/09

    In reply to OK, What 7 Things Can The Gerber Shard Multitool Do?
    Can be used as/to:
    1.) Animate all mechanical objects upon contact
    2.) Look like a fish with a humongous eye
    3.) An IUD
    4.) A Fusion Reactor
    5.) An Intergalactic spacecraft
    6.) Lube
    7.) A Lanyard Hole
     Reply
    Edited by Duckspwn at 10/29/09 9:48 PM Duckspwn was starred Duckspwn was unstarred
    Image of Curves Curves
    10/29/09

    In reply to OK, What 7 Things Can The Gerber Shard Multitool Do?
    Brass Knuckles. #gerbershard
     Reply
    Curves was starred Curves was unstarred
    Image of cobaltage cobaltage
    10/29/09

    In reply to OK, What 7 Things Can The Gerber Shard Multitool Do?
    1. occupies physical space
    2. carries a measurable mass
    3. holds certain properties
    4. persists in time
    5. can serve as an object of experience
    6. can be used for self-instrumentation (including nose picking)
    7. lanyard attachment #gerbershard
     Reply
    lostarchitect promoted this comment cobaltage was starred cobaltage was unstarred
    Image of Snes Snes
    10/29/09

    In reply to OK, What 7 Things Can The Gerber Shard Multitool Do?
    Let's see...

    1. Philips head screw driver
    2. Flat head screw driver
    3. Glass breaker
    4. Wire stripper
    5. Pry bar
    6. Nail puller
    7. Bottle opener

    There's my guess on the 7 functions. My guess on the flat head screw driver is a little iffy looks like the pry bar end may or may not have a flat head on there. All I know is that I want one. #gerbershard
     Reply
    tande04 promoted this comment Snes was starred Snes was unstarred
    Image of tande04 tande04
    10/29/09

    @Snes: That is a good guess since they do often get the flat head in on the end of the pry bar.

    I've got almost the exact thing but it has an x-acto blade on it. Won't let me take that on a plane. #gerbershard
     Reply
    tande04 was starred tande04 was unstarred
    Image of Twanzio Twanzio
    10/29/09

    In reply to OK, What 7 Things Can The Gerber Shard Multitool Do?
    1. Bottle opener
    2. Nail remover
    3. um... oh! A wire stripper
    4. jeez... uh.. a pokie end.. for poking...
    5. Also..hrm.. (let's see.. 3 more..) a Large hole for placement of round pegs.
    6. ???
    7. Profit! #gerbershard
     Reply
    nutbastard promoted this comment Twanzio was starred Twanzio was unstarred
    Image of Lite: hates Illinois Nazis Lite: hates Illinois Nazis
    10/29/09

    In reply to OK, What 7 Things Can The Gerber Shard Multitool Do?
    Let's see:
    I can get through security with a pen.
    I can write things with a pen.
    I can shank the stewardess with a pen.
    I can blind defenders by stabbing their eyeballs out with a pen.

    TSA doesn't care if I have 1 pen or 50 pens.

    I can strangle someone with a cat5 cable.
    I can subdue folk with zip ties.
    I can carry an LED flashlight bright enough to blind people that doubles as a fist pack.
    I can put that same flashlight in a sock to use as a sap.

    Please don't get me started on how ridiculous this thing is along with TSA's rules for our safety. #gerbershard
     Reply
    Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was starred Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was unstarred
    Image of bagellord bagellord
    10/29/09

    @Lite: hates Illinois Nazis: SAVE THE CHILDREN FROM THE FLASHLIGHTS! #gerbershard
     Reply
    bagellord was starred bagellord was unstarred
    Image of Parapraxis Parapraxis
    10/29/09

    @Lite: hates Illinois Nazis: are you one of those guys who carries around anthrax... for duck hunting?

    (Bonus points if you can name the quote!!) #gerbershard
     Reply
    Lite: hates Illinois Nazis promoted this comment Parapraxis was starred Parapraxis was unstarred
    Image of Lite: hates Illinois Nazis Lite: hates Illinois Nazis
    10/29/09

    @Parapraxis: Meh, Futurama.

    I'm just very aware of what I carry that can be used as a weapon is all. #gerbershard
     Reply
    Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was starred Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was unstarred
    Image of mr_bigglesworth mr_bigglesworth
    10/29/09

    @Lite: hates Illinois Nazis: yeah, i get weard looks when i whip out my fleshlight, and i'm like what? its perfectly normal!!!

    wait....were still talkin bout the same thing right? #gerbershard
     Reply
    Lite: hates Illinois Nazis promoted this comment mr_bigglesworth was starred mr_bigglesworth was unstarred
    Image of Lite: hates Illinois Nazis Lite: hates Illinois Nazis
    10/29/09

    @mr_bigglesworth: The proper response when they fondle your fleshlight is: "I'm sorry, if I'd known you'd be playing with it I'd have washed it first." #gerbershard
     Reply
    Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was starred Lite: hates Illinois Nazis was unstarred
    Image of Thinger Thinger
    10/29/09

    In reply to OK, What 7 Things Can The Gerber Shard Multitool Do?
    Leatherman FTW...yes, I am the one Leatherman fanboy. #gerbershard
     Reply
    bagellord promoted this comment Thinger was starred Thinger was unstarred
    Image of bagellord bagellord
    10/29/09

    @Thinger: I like Leatherman too lol. #gerbershard
     Reply
    bagellord was starred bagellord was unstarred
    Image of twoeightnine twoeightnine
    10/29/09

    In reply to OK, What 7 Things Can The Gerber Shard Multitool Do?
    If it's anything like the 3 Gerber multi-tools I went through this past season number 7 will be piece of shit. #gerbershard
     Reply
    twoeightnine was starred twoeightnine was unstarred
    Image of 00000000 00000000
    10/29/09

    In reply to OK, What 7 Things Can The Gerber Shard Multitool Do?
    Bullseye's list:
    1:Deadly Projectile
    2:Deadly Projectile
    3:Deadly Projectile
    4:Deadly Projectile
    5:Deadly Projectile
    6:Deadly Projectile
    7:Deadly Projectile Remover #gerbershard
     Reply
    met2art promoted this comment 00000000 was starred 00000000 was unstarred
    Image of OMG! Ponies! OMG! Ponies!
    10/29/09

    In reply to OK, What 7 Things Can The Gerber Shard Multitool Do?
    Thank goodness that I'll be able to cut things, strip wires, pry up nails and boards, and undo screws while on a plane. Until now, I've always been frustrated that I couldn't try to damage the structural integrity of an aircraft mid-flight.
     Reply
    Edited by OMG! Ponies! at 10/29/09 5:57 PM OMG! Ponies! was starred OMG! Ponies! was unstarred
    Image of met2art met2art
    10/29/09

    @OMG! Ponies!: Say what you will about airlines cutting back on services, but Southwest is stepping up. They are damaging the structural integrity of their aircraft for you. #gerbershard
     Reply
    met2art was starred met2art was unstarred
    Image of Hank Scorpio Hank Scorpio
    10/29/09

    In reply to OK, What 7 Things Can The Gerber Shard Multitool Do?
    Too bad there's already a Photoshop contest for the week! #gerbershard
     Reply
    Hank Scorpio was starred Hank Scorpio was unstarred
    Image of MJDeviant MJDeviant
    10/29/09

    In reply to OK, What 7 Things Can The Gerber Shard Multitool Do?
    1. Puncture your scrotum
    2.
    3.
    4.
    5.
    6.
    7. Open A Beer in the Waiting Room #gerbershard
     Reply
    chauncy that billups promoted this comment MJDeviant was starred MJDeviant was unstarred
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