Blood was reported to spill from the deceased, unfortunate test animals, but it was instantly turned to water. Blood to water—not even Jesus could do that. The officials that attended were so in awe of the dazzling power, they prevented any further development until the Death Ray Machine could be put to a useful, defensive purpose by the government. No one knows what became of the Death Ray Machine, but we think it just may be the scariest vaporware ever. [Modern Mechanix via Boing Boing]

I can imagine that artists, musicians and video editors would like something like this... however, there are solid LCD tablet displays and Tablet PCs on the market already. Experience shows that, for the time being, it's a limited market. Further limiting it to a keyboard replacement could be economically impractical at best, never mind how practical this could be. The issue of the price is the other key here: by the time a touch surface keyboard could be a commercial reality coming from China via Moscow, touch computing from Apple and Microsoft would be so ubiquitous that it won't make sense anymore. [Art.Lebedev]

The touch-screen interface is going to be built on a Symbian 60 OS base that still retains its standard UI.

Quite frankly, it looks to us as a little bit of good old FUD to hold the market while scrambling to match the iPhone. A year is a lot of time to wait for a worthy iPhone killer and we believe that real competition always benefits all of us, the consumers. And even if it was real, I'd assume they'd run into legal trouble for infringing on Apple US Patent #12341235ASDF for "Mind Bendingly Cool Phone" and other assorted UI methods.

So come on, couldn't you have done this demo on a piece of hardware not so Apple-like? Where's your pride? [Nok Nok]

Zenum Opus PDA Phone in May [Unwired via Slash Gear]

This makes the keyboard seem even less interesting than it was before, and it's gotten down to pretty uninteresting levels at this point. Next they'll announce that rather than OLED screens, the keys will be very small flipbooks. –Adam Frucci

Optimus Key Prototype from Taiwan [Optimus Project]

They're gonna keep on truckin' with the development while looking for a new manufacturer, but even more delays are probably inevitable. But hey, were you really planning on spending $1,500 on a keyboard? You just want it to come out so we can get one and post lots of pictures of it, so it's not like this is really that much of a blow to you. –Adam Frucci

Bad News and Good News [Optimus Project]

Making this work is existing technology known as beamforming, combined with sound localization using a camera or specialized microphone array. Mix that hardware up with a fancy software algorithm, and audio will be able to follow the listener around the room without disturbing others. Is this even possible, and if so, won't it be prohibitively expensive?

Microsoft aims to create that software algorithm, working with cheap speaker arrays such as its prototype pictured here, positioned in or around computer monitors. While the company admits the technology may be three years from actually working, if it ever does, it's hoping to include this audio beamforming algorithm in every copy of Windows Media Player.

Sure, audio projection has already been done, but not with this degree of accuracy. How will this be done? Insert miracle here. This technology sounds so far-fetched that we wouldn't recommend getting rid of those headsets any time soon. – Charlie White

Computer Speakers for Your Ears Only [Technology Review]

So now the official name of this much-delayed and over-hyped keyboard is Optimus Maximus. Too bad the damn thing will have a maximus price to go along with that naming conceit, spanking early adopters with a $1490 price tag, and now the company is saying it won't be available until December of this year. If ever. Sigh. – Charlie White

Optimus Keyboards [Art.Lebedev]

Olympus also said the E-1 will have the Fulltime Live View function, just like the E-410 and E-510, and added there will be unspecified "tremendous improvements in both performance and functionality, taking the excellent picture quality, mobility and reliability of the E-1 to new and unprecedented levels."

So in other words, it looks like Olympus missed a target or two, and wants to give itself nine months to roll out this camera. We're not holding our breath. – Charlie White

Olympus E-1 successor hinting continues [DP Review]

Our previous hands-on with this made it seem pretty robust, but their display here just screamed vaporware. Here's hoping that's not the case. –Adam Frucci

CES 2007 [Gizmodo]

Another piece of vaporware noted by Wired is the "iPod Killer." Thinking about the year in review it does seem every month there was another new iPod killer that ultimately failed (even the biggest iPod killer of all, the Zune). Topping the list as the number one piece of vaporware of 2006 is actually a repeat winner: Duke Nukem Forever. Congrats, Duke. – Travis Hudson

Vaporware '06: Return of the King [Wired News]

"I actually paid for the $100 prepay before April 1st when it became $120. Now the ship date has gone from June 1st, to August 15th and it looks like the price went up from $120 to now $160. However, those of us "smart" enough to get in on the ground floor won't have to pay a dime more (of course not, they can't refund the money; they've spent it). Here's to being optimistic, but I'm pulling out. It's vaporware in my book. Oh yeah, 5% extra off of any additional purchases. Wow."

Product Page Thanks, Jeff!

We almost can't believe the news that after two long years of saying "we'll launch it later this summer" and our favorite, "we'll launch it next year", it looks like Disney will actually be launching their Disney Mobile phone service this summer. Only Pumbaa truly understands how we feel.

Disney Mobile
Disney Phone Service Has Parents in Mind [NY Times]
Disney unveils MVNO plans, parents the target [Mobiletracker]

December 2005 saw the launch of the iBoxer, men's boxers with a special pocket on the side to carry your iPod. Play Underwear's site has a page up for the Womens iBoxer now and it's surprisingly attractive, as you can see to the left. Price is still TBA though, so who knows if it'll actually make it to market?

At any rate, we at Gizmodo would like to commend Play for going with boxers instead of making the iPanty or worse, the iThong.

Womens iBoxer [Play Underwear]
iPod Underwear Has Arrived! [Gizmodo]
NSFW! iThong [YTMND] NSFW!

iBoxers for men for $22 [Amazon]

Designed by Igor Solovyov and Maria Solovyova—what is it with Eastern Europeans and vaporware?—this thing could be stuck to a bare wrist near you in the next few years.

Timeflex [YankoDesign]