The favorite toe-shoe of vegan restaurant servers and 55-year-old men with ponytails has settled a class action lawsuit brought against it by what sounds like every person who ever wore its foot-condoms.
Fact: No one has ever looked at a pair of Wingtips and thought they should be more like hideous looking Vibram FiveFingers. Fact: No one has ever wanted to wear Vibrams as dress shoes and wasn't crazy. Fact: Anything horrible should always be burned from this Earth for maximum visual and soul-fueling pleasure.
They're toe shoes, for running—but wait! Only four toes? And those soles... thick but light. Just what the hell are these things? They're Fila's new Skele-toes Amp. The company's first attempt at a more natural running shoe. Do they actually perform, or are they just trying to ride the barefoot bandwagon?
These are the Outlier Feit Supermarines. They cost $260. Wait! Before you finish that spit-take, let me explain.
Those ridiculous-miraculous-awesome-awful Vibrams shoes are growing up over the bodies of their fanboys like a symbiotic organism. Their cold-weather boots—FiveFingers Cervinia—now reach half up your leg. I can't wait for them to create a full-body Dune stillsuit.
Here's a pair of shoes that will no doubt draw stares. Fivefingers from Vibram USA are supposed to give you some sort of a thrill, as if your feet are naked but they're still protected. The Vibram website lists all kinds of pseudo-therapeutical horseshit about why the shoes are oh-so-much better, but we're thinking…