Gizmodo: vintage

The Erotica Phone: 1984's "Masterpiece of Micro-Processor Technology" (NSFW)

Danny Allen — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 21:00:00 EST

Hey, that's their words, not mine—I'm almost lost for any. "Sculptured by a European artist…the phone plugs into any wall-jack and is fully-guaranteed." I bet, just look how classy this gent seems with an ear full of cleavage.

Keep it tasteless 1984. I've no idea what fine publication this appeared in, but it looks like the sales came out of Mission, Kansas. And no, the 1800 number no longer works.

How much would this ultimate conversation piece have set you back? Just $75, including 3-6 week shipping. That's an insane $150 bucks today. I wonder how many they sold... [Paco Camino and LiveJournal via CopyRanter]

High-Def Digital Pinball Machine Doesn't Really "Get" Pinball

Dan Nosowitz — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 03:00:00 EST

Hammacher Schlemmer's digital pinball machine crams a 720p, 32-inch display into a full-sized cabinet, and offers by way of emulation 17 classic boards. But I'm not sure pinball freaks are that interested in digitized flippers.

Not everything's better digitized, you know? People like pinball because it's nostalgic and flawed, not because it's such a great game. Sure, this digital version lets you "bump and tilt," and for $6,000 I'm sure the rendering of the flippers is excellent—but it's got no soul. But since pinball was already pretty much dead by the time I was born, maybe I'm not the best authority on the subject. It's available from HS now. [Hammacher Schlemmer via Technabob Crunchgear]

Obsolete Gadget Tattoos Are Seven Shades of Wrong

Jesus Diaz — Sat, 10 Oct 2009 13:00:00 EDT

Living in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, I've seen my share of intricate, beautiful, and veehee lickable tattoos. The vintage gadget kind are not them. Tumblred by Anna Jane Grossman—démodé-gadgeteer extraordinaire and author of the highly recommended Obsolete—these are a mistake:

I may have an original 1984 Macintosh on my work desk, but I will never ever get a tattoo of it. EVER. A ZX Spectrum, on the other side, is a very likely possibility. It just depends on the amount of Zacapa rum and Margaritas this weekend.

Note to the VHS tattoo dude: If you are going to drill a video tape into your skin for the rest of your life, at least pick a Sony Beta. [Obsolete]

Awesome 1980s Computer Pop-Up Book: A Floppy What Now?

Dan Nosowitz — Sat, 09 May 2009 16:00:00 EDT

Now this is one amazing Goodwill find: A vintage pop-up book designed to teach burgeoning nerds about the wonders of the modern computer. Floppy disks, ASCII, and the dot-matrix printer. Oh my.

Some of this stuff is amazing, like an ASCII and binary decoder, and the hilarious message on the dot-matrix printer:

Now that we've met, I'm ready to work—and play—with you. See you soon! Goodbye.

Computers used to be so adorable (and polite!). [JonathanRyan]

Vintage Gateway Desktop Wallpaper Is Now My Current Desktop Wallpaper

Dan Nosowitz — Sat, 11 Apr 2009 15:15:00 EDT

Ah, the heady days of 1994. Back then, computers were beige and sold with surfing cow wallpaper, and we liked it that way, dammit.

Flickr user Jason Scott stumbled on an old CD (for Windows 3.1!) that came with Gateway desktops, containing a pile of amazing cow-based images to be used for wallpaper. They're all pretty amazing, and make us wish Gateway hadn't abandoned its bovine style so readily. The cow is ripe for a comeback! [Jason Scott Flickr via Boing Boing Gadgets]

Vintage Massagers Look Like Torture Devices

Odelia Lee — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 20:00:00 EDT

The geniuses at Oobject have curated a hilarious gallery of 18 forgotten vibrators/massagers, all of which look more likely to induce pain than pleasure.

All of the vibes have great names like Chic Glorifier, Handy Hannah Vitalator, Stim-U-Lax Junior, Bonger Body Massager, and let's not forget the classic Magic Fingers Hotel Bed Massager. I included my favorites below, but hop over to Oobject for the full effect. If I ever see these in real life, I'm running in the opposite direction. What were ladies in the '50s thinking? [oobject]

Super Electrofluorescent Profanity Machine Tells Time With Intermittent Swear Words

Jack Loftus — Sun, 21 Dec 2008 13:00:00 EST

Truly the masochist's dream clock, the Super Electrofluorescent Profanity Machine gives you the time and then lays down a litany of cuss words and other fine four-letter fare from the English language.

Designed, built and marketed solely by "Koolatron," the clock/display was cobbled together using "vintage Cold War-era Soviet vacuum fluorescent tubes and custom driver circuitry."

According to the designer, every four-letter English word could potentially pop up on the display. To prevent incomprehensible gibberish from ruining your day the device is programmed to display pronounceable words, not random letters. [Etsy via technabob]

Flying Aerocar Auction Shows the Future Comes From 1956

Jesus Diaz — Sat, 29 Nov 2008 17:00:00 EST

This flying automobile is probably the only real transformer in existence: The Aerocar, a machine that actually flies and can be legally driven on a highway. Built by Moulton B. Taylor in 1956 and powered by a Lycoming 160HP engine, you only have to attach the folded wings, tail, and propeller to explore the skies at 165mph. Don't believe it? The FAA does, and you only need $3.5 to buy and enjoy one.

Patented on October 13, 1956, the Aerocar is the only car that is a fully FAA-certified airplane. This one has the FAA registration number N103D and apparently it is in working condition after 1,103 flight hours, even while the last official inspection was performed in 1976. According to the eBay seller, "an informal inspection of the plane by an FAA licensed A&P aircraft mechanic was performed in August of 2006." [eBay via Dark Roasted Blend]

Hardware Hoarder Builds Australia's Largest Computer Museum In His House

John Herrman — Mon, 24 Nov 2008 07:00:01 EST

Max Burnet worked with computers for his whole life, and he hasn't strayed far in retirement: he's collected a massive amount of vintage computer hardware in his house, creating the what is claimed to be the largest collection of its kind in Australia, and one of the most extensive in the world. He's got everything from a 20s era electro-mechanical tote board to punch card mainframes to the Apple Lisa in his huge stockpile, and odd curios aren't neglected; he's got early hard drive and RAM specimens, as well as a library of over 6000 vintage computing manuals.

As was probably the case with the Apple pack rat before him, Burnet's collection must have been borne of a special mix of odd psychology and determined enthusiasm. Check out a full gallery here. [CIO via Slashdot]

Perspektiva Lamp: For Anyone Who Dreams of Being Stalked By the Paparazzi

Sean Fallon — Thu, 03 Apr 2008 18:20:00 EDT

According to the designers at Transparent House, the idea behind the Perspecktiva lamp was "to integrate an iconic object into modern day life while maintaining the qualities of art and function." In this case the "iconic object" was a vintage camera inspired by the classic Leica design. The result is a work of art that should appeal to just about anyone—especially Hollywood hopefuls that dream that they too will one day have to file a restraining order against a paparazzo. Too bad it is only a concept at this point. Video after the break.

[Transparent House]

Vintage View-Master Clock: A Reminder That You Are Getting Old

Sean Fallon — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 21:00:19 EST

View-Masters were a part of just about everyone's childhood. For those trying to relive those days, Minnesota artist Debra Dressler has come up with these handmade clocks made with genuine vintage View-Masters. As you might suspect, "handmade" and "vintage" are usually codewords for "expensive," and at $145, that is pretty much the case here. However, if that is a little more money than you want to spend on a clock, you could probably build one using a newer View-Master fairly easily. [Uncommon Goods]

Death Ray Machine Does What Jesus Could Not

Haroon Malik — Sun, 27 Jan 2008 19:00:00 EST

For this week's retromodo installation, we're looking at the Death Ray Machine, (awesome name). Apparently, the device was put together by a Cleveland scientist, and its abilities were only showcased in a one time display to members of the National Inventors' Congress at Omaha, Nebraska. The Death Ray Machine was witnessed to instantly kill dogs, cats and rabbits once its beam shone on them.

Blood was reported to spill from the deceased, unfortunate test animals, but it was instantly turned to water. Blood to water—not even Jesus could do that. The officials that attended were so in awe of the dazzling power, they prevented any further development until the Death Ray Machine could be put to a useful, defensive purpose by the government. No one knows what became of the Death Ray Machine, but we think it just may be the scariest vaporware ever. [Modern Mechanix via Boing Boing]

Vintage Transformers Shirts

Jason Chen — Mon, 16 Jul 2007 14:40:18 EDT

We thought the new Transformers movie was fantastic, but if you're one of those people who were totally offended at what Michael Bay did to your childhood, these vintage shirts give you the chance to wear your feelings on your sleeve. Well, more like your Optimus on your chest, but same deal. Pick one of five "classic" designs, one of which isn't really classic, but still quite cool anyway. [NerdyShirts via Crunchgear]

DIY Atari Joystick TV Remote Mod

Travis Hudson — Thu, 17 May 2007 21:00:52 EDT

Alan over at HackedGadgets put together this nifty little mod that is a great addition to any retro gamer's home entertainment center. Unfortunately, this mod uses one of those all-in-one controller game console things rather than an original Atari controller, but I'm not too picky. Hit the link to see how Alan did it, step-by-step. Remember the Atari paddles? I think I would rather put a TV remote in one of those. –Travis Hudson

Atari 2600 Joystick TV Remote Control [Hacked Gadgets]

USB Eraser Doesn't Erase Data (Hopefully)

Travis Hudson — Thu, 10 May 2007 17:45:20 EDT

Sometimes the most simple shape can bring back a lot of fond memories. Remember the days of elementary school and the school supply lists? Call me a bit of a geek but I was always fond of the classic pink eraser and now it has been converted over to a more modern application in the form of a USB flash drive. The eraser flash drive is made by the folks at Outofstock (which could be a very misleading company name). The 1GB model will set you back $75. –Travis Hudson

Product Page [Via Gearfuse]

Original Gameboy PC

Travis Hudson — Wed, 09 May 2007 13:30:41 EDT

I'm normally a stickler for craftsmanship and would traditionally crap all over this mod for looking pretty assy, but I'll hold back because it is an entire PC fitted into an original Gameboy. Using the ultra-compact EPIA PX10000G motherboard, this classic gaming device can now tackle quite a bit more than monochrome Tetris. Ethernet, two USB ports and VGA output are even included. Now work on a getting a screen in there, ASAP. –Travis Hudson

The Gameboy's second youth [Akihabara]

Vintage Apple Mouse Garage Door Opener

Travis Hudson — Fri, 04 May 2007 15:40:59 EDT

We love a good, vintage mod around these parts and this Apple bus mouse garage door opener just tickled me pink. Maker S1axter found a gutted Apple bus mouse and was instantly inspired.

So I got bored tonight and started going though my box-o-cables and came across an old Apple bus mouse I had gutted years ago. I always wanted to turn it into a garage door opener but never got around to it. Well, coincidently the garage door opener for my apartment parking is the perfect size to sit inside the mouse with room for a switch.

Now, make one that works as a garage door opener and actual mouse for a car PC and I will be really impressed. –Travis Hudson

Apple bus moue as a garage door opener [MAKE]

Nokia Brings Back the 3310 Brick, Kind of

Travis Hudson — Tue, 27 Mar 2007 16:20:35 EDT

Remember the Nokia 3310 brickish cellphone from the '90s? It's back, baby. The Nokia 3310 classic has passed through the rigorous ass-pounding by the FCC and is ready to bring back the golden-old days where the classic Nokia ringtone would ruin my movies, rather than horrible rips of crappy rap songs. The phone has been updated with support for GSM networks, a 1.3-megapixel camera, microSD expandability, and more.

Here is my problem: This "3310 Classic" looks nothing like the vintage 3310. The only similar feature is the candybar or "brick" form factor. I am thoroughly disappointed in Nokia trying to exploit the classic 3310 to hock another ho-hum cellphone. –Travis Hudson

Nokia 3310 Classic Gets FCC Nod [MobileWhack]

DIY Wireless Retro NES, SNES for the Wii

Travis Hudson — Wed, 21 Feb 2007 15:45:15 EST

If playing some of the classics on your Wii virtual arcade with the very un-retro Wiimote isn't fitting your fancy, then this mod might be for you. Mark Feldman put together a decent tutorial to convert the classic NES or SNES controllers to work with the Nintendo Wii, wirelessly. Remember your roots, kids. Like most mods, some electronics know-how is needed for this project. –Travis Hudson

Mod Information Page [Via Hack A Day]

1946 Vespa Clock: Better Than the Scooter?

Mark Wilson — Sat, 17 Feb 2007 14:30:47 EST

I realize that to some, Vespas are synonymous with cruising the countryside on a warm afternoon. You sip from a fine vintage while feeding your new fiancee bits of prosciutto—all before you make love under the sunset.

But to a lanky...ok, kinda fat...6'1" American male like myself, Vespas more often equate with looking like a tool. Luckily for me, I can take the Italian love affair to my desk with the 1946 Vespa Clock. Manufactured from an authentic vintage headlamp, this AA-powered timepiece captures the elegant Vespa style without housing my bulgy, less intended curvature. $178 – Mark Wilson

Product Page [via newlaunches]