This Guy Tried to Float Across the Border On 50 Pounds of Marijuana

The United States Border Patrol busted a would-be Mexican smuggler attempting to float across the border on a 50-pound marijuana raft. In fact, he made it across the border, but didn't get to land. The AP reports that he was a mere 600 yards from shore before getting busted. Where there's a weed, there's a way. » 9/27/13 10:40am 9/27/13 10:40am

The Secret to Weight Loss Might Be Poop Transplants From Skinny People

As unlikely as it might seem, fecal transplants are actually turning out to be the stuff dreams are made of. And apparently, this magical poop procedure still has plenty to give. After some successful rounds of experimenting, scientists now believe that one possible answer to the rampant obesity problem could very… » 9/06/13 6:40pm 9/06/13 6:40pm

These Disgusting Red Worms Have Been Found in Tap Water

Never drink water again. Or never drink water for as long as humanly possible. Or fine, drink water but make sure you watch out for these disgusting little red worms that have somehow dug their way through inside a water filtering system in Oklahoma. Those red worms—ranging from half an inch to an inch long—were… » 8/30/13 4:00am 8/30/13 4:00am

Hospital Fined for Putting Poop Germs in Patients' Brains on Purpose

There's a reason surgeons wear masks and gloves. The last thing you want is to get crap in someone's body. That is, unless you are one of the two UC Davis Medical Center neurosurgeons who very purposely introduced their patents' brains to poop bacteria. It was a real shit-for-brains way of trying to help. » 8/23/13 4:10pm 8/23/13 4:10pm

Forbes Uses Furry Convention Logo in Obamacare Article For Some Reason

Forbes had a fun little piece the other day in which they answered a few common questions people had been asking about Obamacare—because healthcare can be confusing! Almost as confusing as, say, pulling the logo of a wildly popular furries convention to use as the accompanying graphic on an article about Obamacare.… » 8/16/13 1:22pm 8/16/13 1:22pm

Resourceful Slacker Jams an Entire Airport Network to Get Off Work

As is becoming increasingly common, employers often use GPS devices on company cars to track their whereabouts during the workday. Which is great for security, sure, but significantly less great if you need a little you time for yourself (slackers). In order to combat this little hurdle, one New Jersey man named Gary… » 8/09/13 3:20pm 8/09/13 3:20pm

A Woman Who Bought Two iPhones Was Scammed with Two Apples Instead

When you're looking to buy an Apple iPhone off a classifieds ad, you expect certain things. Like it having a working touchscreen. Like it maybe be in one piece. Like it actually being an Apple iPhone and not... just an apple. A woman made the dear mistake of buying two apples in an iPhone box when she really wanted… » 8/02/13 11:00pm 8/02/13 11:00pm

People Are Literally Getting Palm Line Surgery for Better Fortunes

There's fate, and then there's science. But sometimes—just sometimes—the two will join in an unholy union, spawning a monster bearing the worst qualities of both. And that is where cosmetic, surgical palm line adjustment comes in. Because occasionally destiny needs a little shove in the right direction. With a scalpel. » 8/02/13 12:00pm 8/02/13 12:00pm

Idiot Tries to Wear Handgun-Shaped Heels Through Airport Security

Considering we live in an era where the possession of too much hand sanitizer is enough to strike fear in the heart of airport security, you'd think passengers would exercise a little caution when it comes to carry on items—you know, like leaving the gun-shaped paraphernalia at home. You'd be wrong. This past week,… » 7/26/13 3:40pm 7/26/13 3:40pm

Sorry, the World's First Kosher Lube Is Gone as Fast as It Came

Did you need some kosher lube? Too bad, you just missed the once-in-a-lifetime window. Last week, Trigg Laboratories' "Wet" line of products became the world's first kosher lube, but now that coveted blessing has been revoked after the Rabbinical Council of California realized that it is lube for sex. » 7/19/13 5:28pm 7/19/13 5:28pm