Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea - Gizmodo Comments

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

MHooiman — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 14:48:54 EDT

In Tennessee some are trying to pass a bill making a DNA paternity test mandatory at birth. I work for Identigene and it is my opinion that the legal system will have to catch up with DNA testing in many ways. Although, I am not sure about that bill. As far as the cover of our box I agree, however I believe there was extensive market research that went into the design.And hey, really... what could you put on the box that would be acceptible????

MHooiman

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

ackthbbft — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 12:15:58 EDT

Considering more cynical estimates that 1 in 3 births are to men other than the ones named on the birth certificates, and the named ones get stuck with child support for 18 years even after learning it's not their kid, since many states only give as little as two weeks to contest the birth certificate, I think every "new father" should get one of these.

Even better, just make paternity tests part of the birth certificate process, so there are no mistakes. If it's not the guy's biological child, he can decide at that time whether to make it official and adopt.

/dons his flame-retardant gear

ackthbbft

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

mlvds — Wed, 26 Mar 2008 01:29:25 EDT

I take 500...please!

mlvds

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

ideaman2020 — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 23:56:17 EDT

John Mayer here.

@92BuickLeSabre: Some sneetches have stars upon thars...

ideaman2020

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

betogonza — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 22:12:32 EDT

Hell yea, you can do it without her knowing!

betogonza

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

TWSS — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 19:45:08 EDT

I'm not sure what the point of this product is. You could just TELL your kid that you're not the real father and screw them up perfectly adequately without having to blow $150+ on the deal. Hey, it worked for my dad!

TWSS

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

EBone — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 19:13:08 EDT

@CubFan81: That young woman seems to enjoy a lot of unprotected intercourse.

EBone

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

sqeakytoy of the apocalypse — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 19:03:35 EDT

*Stupid lappy keyboard... too many typos.

sqeakytoy of the apocalypse

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

sqeakytoy of the apocalypse — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 19:03:04 EDT

Now what the need to come out with is the Cheerleader/trailer park special with 25 swaps. That should be enough to cover the mom, baby, the whole football team, (offense and defense) as well as the coach and the boyfriend. Just to be sure.

sqeakytoy of the apocalypse

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

92BuickLeSabre — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 18:50:18 EDT

@SchruteBuck: Hey! I just noticed, I go away for a few days, and when I come back all you bozos have stars. Harumph. You can go stuff your "Zings" in a sack!

92BuickLeSabre

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

x23 — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 18:45:53 EDT

@CubFan81: if i'm not mistaken... didn't that lady end up showing up like a total of 15 times and *still* didn't find the dad? not that 11 is fine and good or anything.

x23

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

x23 — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 18:40:53 EDT

@bandit: i saw an episode of "My Two Dads" that had a very similar story line.

x23

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

Lizard_King — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 18:37:18 EDT

I agree with the artwork needing a change but couldn't they have named it something more flashy like "Ain't My Baby's Daddy"

Lizard_King

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

NDub — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 18:31:31 EDT

The box art I want to see is Jesus giving a guy a high five, while in the background, the devil is laughing and pointing at the womans vag area..... I need sleep.

NDub

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

CubFan81 — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 18:25:33 EDT

@ideaman2020: if a kid has brown eyes while both parents have blue then yeah, there's reason to be suspicious. But he said a blue eyed kid from two brown eyes parents which can happen 25% of the time anyways.

My favorite:

CubFan81

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

hnkelley — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 18:25:00 EDT

@SecretAsianMan: Wouldn't that be truth in advertising?

hnkelley

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

1roll20s — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 18:12:40 EDT

The box art should be some father dancing happily while a white trash mother with child looks dejected in the background.

1roll20s

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

sansovino — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 18:12:38 EDT

Makes an excellent gift for the special lady in your life!

sansovino

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

workingonyourinvoice — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 18:09:09 EDT

So is it mandatory for the mother to run offstage and stuff her face into the couch and cry after getting the results?

workingonyourinvoice

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

ideaman2020 — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 18:01:12 EDT

John Mayer here.

@Darrone: If both parents have blue eyes and the child has brown, you can save your money by not buying this.

ideaman2020

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

Camperton — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:52:50 EDT

@wecanfreakit:

you beat me to it. I'm actually kinda stunned he wasn't mentioned in the article

Camperton

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

BigDanInTX — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:44:35 EDT

@Monty: Wow...someone else came up w/ it while I was typing... Must. Type. Faster. ;-]

BigDanInTX

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

BigDanInTX — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:43:13 EDT

"Luke...I'm not your father..."
"Nooooooooooooooooooooo!" (*shakes fist*)

Something pretty disturbing about this. I have two kids and there is absolutely no doubt in my mind that they are mine. They act so much like me it's scary. One looks just like me which is even scarier. ;-]

If one of the parents had doubts, they'd still have to acquire the other's swab or else try to do it in their sleep. I just don't see either scenario working out well. Is it really necessary to get the mother's swab?

Enquiring minds want to know.

BigDanInTX

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

IPT12AC3 — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:39:50 EDT

you know what this means.... lol

IPT12AC3

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

Samifumi — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:34:38 EDT

Darren McFadden is shaking his Dallas Cowboys helmet in anger.

Samifumi

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

Curves — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:33:52 EDT

Mamas Baby; Papas Maybe.

Curves

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

dvicklund — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:33:23 EDT

HAH I've heard commercials for this on the radio for a couple months now... The first time I heard it, I couldn't believe it. But now, I look forward to those times of day when I get to remind myself that I'm fortunate to know who my mommy and daddy are.

dvicklund

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

Evil J — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:30:22 EDT

My brother-in-law could actually use this.

His live-in GF just left him for her ex-boyfriend... pregnant with what is supposedly my brother-in-law's kid.

Sad thing is, my brother-in-law isn't white trash, but seems to be a white-trash magnet, so for guys like him... this is a good thing. Maybe not court admissable, but enough to get someone off your back who says that she's "certain" your the baby daddy despite fucking more than one guy.

Evil J

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

Amiash — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:27:32 EDT

This is good way of telling that you're adopted.

Amiash

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

Monty — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:25:13 EDT

"Luke, I am your father."

"NOOOOO!!! Oh, wait... I almost forgot. Could you wipe this swab in your mouth, and can we continue this conversation in a few days, please?"

Monty

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

EBone — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:25:03 EDT

@jbhitter24: It's some kind of oxymoron I think.

EBone

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

snakepliskin — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:24:38 EDT

Now i have to wait 3-5 days before i kill my exgf? Lame.

snakepliskin

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

EBone — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:24:24 EDT

@Darrone: Yes, but over-the-counter HIV tests are when the REAL hilarity ensues...

EBone

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

jbhitter24 — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:24:14 EDT

@bandit: "good episode of "Two and a Half Men""

i don't understand.

jbhitter24

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

EBone — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:22:45 EDT

@bandit: That's what Maury Povich is for!

EBone

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

Darrone — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:20:42 EDT

@EBone: Dude, if you're the kind of mother that buys OTC paternity tests, theres a good chance she has no idea who the father is.... it would be easy to swab a guy while hes asleep. Did I mention this is great fodder for sitcoms?

Darrone

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

SchruteBuck — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:19:36 EDT

@92BuickLeSabre: ZING!

SchruteBuck

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

bandit — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:18:53 EDT

Could also be useful to remove doubts if the mother was knowingly involved with two men at the same time (e.g. pre-marriage breakup, swingers). There was a good episode of "Two and a Half Men" about that.

bandit

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

92BuickLeSabre — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:18:33 EDT

@SchruteBuck: You should see the art on the other side of the box.

92BuickLeSabre

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

SchruteBuck — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:18:18 EDT

@SecretAsianMan: How about a broken condom?

SchruteBuck

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

EBone — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:16:41 EDT

@SchruteBuck: Agreed. Looks like a mom holding a baby. Unless she's worried about a switcheroo at the hospital, she's gonna know what popped out of her.

EBone

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

Darrone — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:15:21 EDT

"an another"....

Um, how about any father that wants to know why the kid looks like the frigin mailman BEFORE he talks to his wife? I mean seriously, great product. More in the way of peace of mind when a kid has blue eyes and two brown eyes parents.

Darrone

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

SecretAsianMan — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:15:12 EDT

@SchruteBuck: What would you rather see on the box? A crying man?

SecretAsianMan

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

EBone — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:15:08 EDT

Not for me - I have no kids...THAT I KNOW OF! Hahahahahaha!!!

Sorry. Had a flashback to the 80s for a second there.

EBone

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

jbhitter24 — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:14:23 EDT

i'm adopted?!?

jbhitter24

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

electrikecho — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:14:08 EDT

I'm not sure how this would sell, like Jason said, who would get one of these just out of curiosity [...] ?

The novelty of it would really put a family's trust in one another to the test: I'm sure if Dad discovers that the child is more related to his plumber than himself, he'd probably not just shrug it off like it was a non-winning lottery ticket.

I just don't see anyone I know bringing one of these to dinner with their parents.

electrikecho

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

SchruteBuck — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:13:32 EDT

I don't think the box art is really on target here.

SchruteBuck

Over the Counter DNA Paternity Tests Seem Like a Great Idea

wecanfreakit — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 17:05:50 EDT

this is the end of maury as we know it.

YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER...

YEAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

wecanfreakit