The next-gen console war is brewing! Can you hear the sweet percolation of multi-billion dollar corporations battling for marketshare? Such beautiful music. Here's a slice of what happened at Kotaku this week.

Sony's PlayStation 3 is doomed for failure. In fact, I'm pretty sure they're going to cancel it. Oh you want reasons? Well, first of all, they can't fit all the technical wizardry in the box! And... and get this: they're still shopping for components! Ken, seriously, just give up already. There is no way you're launching this thing ever. The undeniable fact that E3 most likely won't even have a single PS3 on the show floor just clinches it. Too bad, really. I was looking forward to E3 until now.

The good Rev news is that Nintendo expects some 20-odd launch titles. That's good news for gamers but bad news for Mr. Wallet, who's really starting to get pissed with all the unnecessary purchasing this year. For more details on what an ass you're going to look like playing all 20 of these games, here's some photographic evidence.

Yes, Burger King is getting more involved with video gaming, most likely in an attempt to tighten their stranglehold on the twenty-something market, and yes, they are pissed at Kotaku for posting the details. Oh, the lovely lovely details. Watch this space for more from the King and His Royal Attorneys.

Brain Age for the Nintendo DS starts its official American domination this week, and our man in Japan Brian Ashcraft sat down with the real life prof who's polygonal visage you'll see throughout the non-game. If you're a fan of infra-red spectroscopy and the prefrontal cortex of the bilateral hemispheres, do NOT miss this one.

On the other end of the brain spectrum, it would appear that all this gaming I've been doing is closely related to my rage, boozing, and smoking of illegal substances. I'm not passing judgment on anyone who's imbibing while playing, I just want to know: who can I sue?

Speaking of the decline of civilization, do not miss the Girls of CS, the "online gaming community and nude pinup gallery" that pretty much wraps up my Saturday mornings into a tidy little package. I think I speak for all of us when I say, thank God someone has finally brought boobs back to gaming.

The best news of the week? Gitaroo Man is coming for the PSP. Hallelujah!