Jeff Bezos Is Tragically No Longer Worth $100 Billion

Photo: Getty Images
Photo: Getty Images

On Black Friday, Amazon CEO and richest man in the world Jeff Bezos—famous for both his dominance of the entire online retail market and pivot to rock-hard biceps—hit a net worth of $100 billion, according to a Bloomberg analysis.


Alas, the brightest stars burn shortest, and this tale of hubris has collided with a tragic end. Also per Bloomberg, a Wednesday wipeout saw Bezos plummet from his $100 billion throne with a single-day loss in Amazon shares of of $2.5 billion. Our sweet, market-destroying angel will simply have to make do with his $97.5 billion, for now.


"... An upperclassman who had been researching terrorist groups online." - Washington Post

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There’s no way the lead photo isn’t his wax figure from Madame Tussauds.