The highly reliable New York Post reports that XM Satellite Radio will merge with Sirius Satellite Radio as early as today. This makes the 287th time that we've heard such a rumor. According to the Post's super secret sources, the two companies held a slumber party all weekend long trying to come up with a deal that was suitable to both parties. The same sources suggest that the Sirius will be the Man in the relationship, with XM playing second fiddle to the little doggy company. Chalk this up to its "higher enterprise value." I guess now we can look forward to Sirius' Howard Stern (who invented everything, remember) fighting XM's Opie & Anthony on-air. That is, if the feckless Stern doesn't take the rest of the year living it up in the Hamptons.

Why should we even give a damn?

Well, it's entirely too early to tell, especially since this rumor is just that, a rumor. But XM hasn't come out with new hardware for a while now (I asked Samsung at CES if we could expect a new portable player, and was told that the RIAA lawsuit really hurt XM's chances of coming out with another portable anytime soon) and Sirius' hardware generally sucks. Maybe if they merge they can fight off lawsuits and design something that's not the size of a Cadillac.

Heavenly Deal:
Sirius, XM Set To Confirm Merger Plan Today [New York Post via]