Lawn Darts Are Back, Deadlier Than Ever

Illustration for article titled Lawn Darts Are Back, Deadlier Than Ever

Lawn Darts were a game from a simpler, more naive time. Sure, they could embed themselves in your little sister's head just as easily as the lawn, but they were fun. Now they're back.

They're back thanks to the unfortunately named Jarts In Your Heart web site, which sells the banned items thanks to a little bit of legal gymnastics. You see, since lawn darts (or "Jarts" as they're known here) transform so easily from an innocent backyard game into deadly weapon depending on who's holding them, Jarts In Your Heart has to sell the plastic fins and metal tips separately. Sad.

Jarts in the Heart isn't bitter about the game's fate in the slightest, of course:

"These Jarts are NOT toys. They should be kept out of reach from children. They should be treated as you would a bow and arrow. These have and will puncture a person. If you have the IQ of a monkey please don't buy lawn darts. I will not sell to anyone under 18. I do not have many sets left so when they're gone they're gone [...] Jarts in Your Heart will not be held liable for any death or injury caused by these Jarts. By purchasing from Jarts in your heart you agree to these terms. Again, I can not stress this enough. If you're an idiot just don't buy Jarts, stick to playing Horseshoes, Baggo or that ladder ball game."


The total package is $65. The snarky, snotty product description above is free. Let's be safe out there. [Jarts In Your Heart via CrunchGear]

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I remember some friends of mine having "safe" lawn darts shortly after the ones with the points were banned.

As far as I was concerned, the "safe" ones were even MORE deadly, because they looked like a little mini umbrella with a lead weight on top. So you hurl this thing up in the air, and have roughly 3 lbs of weight coming hurtling back down to earth to brain anyone standing underneath it.

Sorry, but anyone who stood near where the thrower was aiming when they were throwing it was just asking to be put into the Darwin Award hall of fame.