Months pass without any major incident. You release updates such as the iPhone 3G, with 128GB of flash memory, front-facing camera, iChat support, cut & paste, but shorter battery life. Some people like it, some people don’t. It’s the usual.

However, on March 17 2010, medical researchers discover an ailment called aluminum poisoning, caused by too much skin contact with the alloy. Symptoms are several times more severe when the aluminum is licked, so 57% of Apple customers are treated for this condition.

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A class action lawsuit is filed on behalf of the afflicted. You…

• Recall all your products with aluminum on it. Turn to page 87.
• Ignore the problem, and slowly phase out aluminum products. Turn to page 34.
• Give all customers who purchased an aluminum product a $100 credit to the Apple store (not applicable in the iTunes music store). Turn to page 74.

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