Today's tragic news shouldn't keep you from enjoying your Segway. On the contrary, the most fitting tribute to deceased company owner Jimi Heselden is to bust out your revolutionary transportation device, and, well, change everything.
1. Pimp It the F*ck Out
We'll skip the obvious Xzibit references here, but one approach to modding anything is just to make it look as crazy as possible. Taking a page from the aesthetics of late 90s music videos, Segway of Oakland delivered a customization that looks like something Juvenile would ride through the park. Carbon fiber, Lamborghini branding, and ginormous rims. Ostentatious Segway fans—your chariot awaits.
2. Entertain the Masses With It
Maybe your last party would have been a lot more fun if you had been in your house, rolling around on a Segway, blasting music videos. You know, just a suggestion. A collaboration between advertising firm Brand Marketers and the handy people at Segway of Oakland, this mobile multimedia rig, packing an HDTV and DVD player into your ride, allowing you to broadcast your favorite flick on the go. Though we might recommend something a little more captivating than the Segway training video, as seen above.
3. Make It Faster With Gigantic Wheels
Segway speedster Christo is not content with the family friendly velocity of the stock Segway. So, rather than complain, he slapped 36" wheels on it, and started gunning for speed records. The Segway's new feet give it a potential max speed of 24 miles per hour, though so far he's only achieved around 20. Still. This is a Segway we're talking about. Push it to the limit, Christo.
4. Make It (Absurdly) Safe
Those Segways can be tricky! As much as the gyroscopic brain inside churns and churns to keep you upright, sometimes gravity gets the best of you, and you find yourself quickly on your ass. Segway-related tumbles have to rank up there among some of the most embarrassing possible, so why not eliminate wipeouts altogether by adding six additional wheels? Perhaps it won't be the most nimble way to jaunt around, but remember what mother always said—Safety First.
5. Save Someone's Life With It
The visionaries at Segway of Oakland like to have fun, but this mod could actually be an EMT's best friend, if mass produced. The ambulance package adds a bevy of medical and emergency gear to the Oakland modders' "heavy hauler" model, which outfits the Segway with a reinforced cargo platform. Getting first responders to the scene of an accident might have been what the Segway was made for all along.
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