One could argue that everyone in the 80s dressed like total douchebags. That's probably true. I'm guilty of that (thanks mom!). But you can also argue that Apple users wearing Apple gear looked extra-douchebaggy with vagina cleaning foam on top.

I still have a few of those striped Apple pins myself. I also had one of those caps. And an Apple clock. And, let's face it, who doesn't want one of those awesome pseudo-Porsche Carrera glasses now? Every Apple hipster would want one nowadays! Heck, I want two pairs.

I can imagine Jon Ive having fits looking at all this stuff, especially the Apple-branded Braun products. And that t-shirt with the bastardized Juanita Banana Apple logo that looks out of a Tex-Mex restaurant franchise menu.

If you want to see a lot more Apple merchandising wonders from the 80s, go to [Retronaut]

I want the sunglasses, but I can't say the same about those belts. Who the hell came up with those?

Even the Dieter Rams-designed Braun calculator looks bastardized with that Apple logo slapped onto it.

Some of the merchandise was particularly naff, like the dumb Macintosh notepad... that I would like to have as an iPad cover.

Everyone knows Apple decanters make the worst wines taste insanely great.

I want that lunchbox. Badly.