Poor Doyle Hardwick just wanted to cruise Facebook in peace, without his wife watching over his shoulder. He tried everything. Asking her nicely, plying her with lots and lots of beer, calling 911 to get the police to resolve the situation. None of those approaches really made much sense. And the last one got him 60 days in jail.

The 57-year-old Pasco, FL, man was arrested for misuse of 911 after he called to have his wife forcibly removed from the seat next to the computer. She had apparently agreed to go to bed if he let her (let her?) drink eight beers. But after further consideration, she decided that she would just stay up, and "didn't feel like sitting anywhere else." So he threatened to call the cops. And she told him to call the cops. And so Doyle called the cops.

According to the deputy on the scene, Hardwick told him, "I just wanted someone to make my wife do what I wanted her to do."

Now, the easy thing to do here is mock Doyle. So let's do that. This is very, very stupid and and ridiculous and bugsbunnyflorida.gif. Yes. But a quick note to Mrs. Hardwick: Next time maybe just check Doyle's search history, since he is clearly not bright enough to hide it. [Tampa Bay Times via WPTV via Fark]