There’s a reason they call it basic training. Because while the Army can teach new recruits how to march, hold a gun, and do push-ups, it unfortunately couldn’t give this battalion of green plastic army men the know-how to survive a surprise attack from molten copper.
If there’s one toy that defines cheap and mass-produced, it’s those buckets full of tiny green plastic army men. They really stop being desirable once you turn six, except when those plastic soldiers are replaced with tiny white stormtroopers led by an equally tiny Darth Vader.
Those classic green plastic army men are as cheap as cheap toys get—that’s why they’re often sold by the bucket. That doesn’t mean they’re not fun, though. So if your kid was born with a silver spoon in its mouth, it only makes sense to skip the plastic and get them a set of silver army men instead.
David Fain may have hit on the only thing missing from the Toy Story movies: a big dance number featuring the green army men. Here, the plastic toys appear to sway and stomp thanks to Fain's stop-motion magic and a swinging instrumental track by Pink Martini.