Ladies and gentlemen, I fear that the fix was in at this year’s World’s Ugliest Dog competition. A three-year-old Neopolitan Mastiff named Martha took the $1,500 top prize at the annual celebration of repulsiveness in Petaluma, California. No offense to Martha, but she’s really not that ugly.
Poor Martha Stewart. She can fold a fitted sheet and polish an antique tea service better than any living human, but she doesn't seem to have mastered #the hashtag. Having seen the carnage she's wrought with just her smartphone camera, we're pretty certain Martha's drone work will end up being A Not Good Thing.
Earlier today a friend sent me this video of Tom Waits performing Down in the Hole. Performing, not singing; Waits at his peak was a throttle-throated spasm of theatricality. It's wonderful. But I still prefer the younger, more melodic Waits. I prefer Martha.