Who would have though a column of fire slowly moving in your direction could be in any way calming?

The sound this massive match bomb makes is kind of a wind-through-the-trees thing, mixed with one of those Calming Ocean Sounds™ relaxation tapes, and the white noise machine in your therapist’s office. Mmmm, just like a campfire, but for some incredibly dangerous reason, it’s indoors.


As a bonus, HTD keeps filming as the matches burn and wilt into a pile of kelp-and-licorice-looking husks (two flavors which probably do not mix well). How this didn’t set off every smoke alarm in a 10 block radius is a total miracle.

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Senior reporter. Tech + labor /// bgmwrites@gmail.com Keybase: keybase.io/bryangm Securedrop: http://gmg7jl25ony5g7ws.onion/

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