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11 Ways to Make Foods Shaped Like Penises

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Popsicles. Corndogs. Shish kabaobs. There are, you know, options. But sometimes, imagery just doesn’t cut it. Here are eleven ways to put penis on the table.

1) Here’s a mold for dick-shaped eggs for breakfast. Doubles as a pancake mold.

2) Hot dogs: already phallic. But put that sausage on naked man on a stick and that it becomes a weiner. (Scrotum included.)

3) Cock-ie cutters so you can make penis cookies. Here’s a sugar cookie recipe you could use. And here’s a gingerbread cookie recipe you could also use, because we don’t discriminate.

4) Penis-shaped pasta, for dick alla vodka. Maybe not alfredo though you SICK FREAK.

5) A penis-shaped cake pan lets you have your dick and eat it too. Any store-bought mix would suffice.

6) And now that you have the penis pan, Penispans.com provides plenty of ways to use it creatively. Phallic palm trees! Elephants with dick noses! Wizards with cock and balls for hats!

7) The penis pan is so handy in the kitchen. It also works as a jello mold.

8) Prefer your dicks in cupcake form? Here’s a set of smaller dong molds.

9) Penis lollipops. Veiny penis lollipops you can buy pre-made.

10) Penis jello shots? Sure, there are molds for those too.

11) Need the recipe for this shlong salad crown roast of frankfurters? Here it is. Thanks a lot Weight Watchers!

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