What better way to endear yourself to a pair of drunken disco-dancing ladies than to spray them with an odd white foam. Why, you'll be the belle of the beach with the new Foam Factory. Inspired by the famed "foam parties" so popular with the Eurotrash of the world, this gun can expectorate 55 cubic feet of foamy sputum in three minutes and comes with a bottle of shampoo for your sexy parties.
"If this miraculous machine doesn't make you the most popular party animal in town we don't know what will," writes the breathless copywriter and we agree. However, if you come near us with that thing, someone's going to be walking home with a limp. About $100.