The $12 Robocup is guaranteed to "take eating a boiled egg to another dimension." Please hold on a sec. With a pitch like that I need to buy the Robocup ASAP.
Done. FACT: Hard-boiled eggs are boring. They don't taste that great either, but that's a far smaller problem. And the Robocup is the perfect solution for spicing up your bland breakfast life.
You place the egg into the Robocup. Once anthropomorphized properly, the
egg miniature spaceman prisoner can be eaten with a spoon he provides for you. Upon digestion, you capture the power of spacemen everywhere—a phenomenon remarkably similar to eating a boiled egg in this dimension—but way better (with some salt).