Breaking News: Obama Dropped His BlackBerry

PAOLI, PENNSYLVANIA: A Gizmodo staffer is officially fed up with increasingly-ridiculous news about Obama's BlackBerry after an AP report on the status of said BlackBerry after a vicious and unwarranted drop onto hard, cold cement.

Sources say Dan Nosowitz, who turns 23 today, does not care in the slightest about the latest rumors regarding President-Elect Obama's BlackBerry. This source, who describes himself as "close to Nosowitz," says the technology blogger experienced debilitating apathy and slight annoyance at an Associated Press story reporting the President-Elect's clumsy inability to retain a tight grip on his well-publicized BlackBerry.

Further, he suggests that Nosowitz was not impressed by the news that Obama will legally be allowed to keep his beloved phone for personal use only, presumably unmonitored by the traditional White House zeal for documentation. Allegedly, Nosowitz suggested that, "Nobody cares."

Says Nosowitz, "I drop shit all the time and the AP never writes stories about me." He later added, "Not even on my birthday (which is today)."

However, Nosowitz was able to maintain a sense of humor about the situation. He is reported to have "laughed derisively" at the ending statement, "Aides report that his device still works." [AP, picture by AP/Charles Dharapak]