Kim Kardashian Will Teach Your Kids the Value of Plastic

If Kim Kardashian is so hard to keep up with, why does she keep popping up in my news feed? And why on earth does she want to shove a credit card into the hands of my (hypothetical) babies?

The Kardashian Prepaid MasterCards are real, and are being marketed to teens and parents who don't know any better. The advantage of a Kardashian Prepaid MasterCard, according to some anonymous shill:

"Teens do not spend their money as their parents think they do," a rep for Mobile Resource, which is launching the card, said. "And, drugs are a huge problem in this country. I give my son a small amount of cash and track his spending on his card."

That's just simple mathematics:

• Cash + Kids = Drugs

• (Kim Kardashian x MasterCard) + Kids - Cash = No Drugs

Parents will reportedly be able to keep up with their kids' expenditures with cellphones, presumably through some sort of app.

So, thank you Kim! For teaching future generations about the value of a hard-earned dollar, and for giving us an excuse to run that picture. [NY Post; Image credit: WWTDD]