Our Consumerist comrades point to handy tips showing how to get out of a cellular service contract that no longer pleases you. Say you want that latest cellphone but your plan doesn't offer it. Unfortunately, sometimes it's easier to get a divorce than it is to get away from Verizon Wireless (or any other provider), so here are our fave ways to slip out the back, Jack:
1. Take advantage of your local lemon law. Get the worst phone you can find your provider offering, one that has lots of known problems. Complain three times, call it a lemon, and then get yourself free.
More of our faves, after the jump.
2. Roam, roam free with the wind. If you have free roaming, your provider still pays for that, ya know? Set your cellphone to Only Roam, and your provider must pay for every roaming charge on every call. If that doesn't work with your phone or service, go to a place where roaming charges would apply, and make lots of long phone calls to people who talk a lot. Then you can drop off the key, Lee.
3. Say you're moving off the face of the earth (or almost). Tell your provider you're moving to some strange town such as in the wilderness of Alaska, where there is no cell phone service. They'll have to dump you. No need to be coy, Roy.