Using Belkin's Weird Powerstrips

[Cue Fairytale music...]Once upon a time, a geek found that he had way too many gadgets, and too few AC outlets to use them all at once. A simple powerstrip would have been a easy fix, but because he considered himself a serious gearhead, he wanted *special* powerstrip.

Using Belkin's Weird Powerstrips

Using Belkin's Weird Powerstrips

Using Belkin's Weird Powerstrips

Using Belkin's Weird Powerstrips

Using Belkin's Weird Powerstrips

Using Belkin's Weird Powerstrips

Using Belkin's Weird Powerstrips

Using Belkin's Weird Powerstrips

Using Belkin's Weird Powerstrips

Using Belkin's Weird Powerstrips

Using Belkin's Weird Powerstrips

Using Belkin's Weird Powerstrips

Using Belkin's Weird Powerstrips

The first one he tried was called the Compact, by Belkin, but had room on top for 4 small sockets, and on its side, 4 great big sockets standing vertically. It was terrific, but maybe too simple; and anyhow, there were actually two more powerstrips by Belkin that were more interesting. One, called the Clamp-On had a claw on it for being mounted on a desk. And one was huge, and had a cable organizer. One was very, very good, and one sucked so bad, it made the geek want to plug it into a heavy, heavy VCR, climb into a rowboat, and drop it to the bottom of the sea.

Using Belkin's Weird Powerstrips


The "Clamp On" powerstrip with the claw on it had a box with a picture on it. The picture explained what the claw was for — attaching it to desks or 2x4 planks of wood! It appeared to have space for 4 small power plugs, and 2 large blocks. This could be useful for keeping outlets off the floor, and close to his work area. But alas, the stupid powerstrip's jaws were too wide to clamp onto a desk, with it's puny spring loaded rubberized and orange teeth. It sagged, and threatened to leap to the floor when the outlets were filled with hungry three-pronged plugs. And too narrow to clamp on a 2x4. It only fit on his weirdly shaped Swedish furniture. (Despite the photo on the box, it was limited to grabbing onto the edges of things no greater than 1.5-inches thick.) A real engineer would have used a vice grip, he thought.

Using Belkin's Weird Powerstrips

The next powerstrip, Conceal was gigantic. It was at least twice as big a the other powerstrips. What a waste of space, the geek thought, as he thumbed the hard plastic case. There was a single lonely outlet on the side of this whale of a powerstrip. Strange. Where were the other outlets? Right after he'd finished this thought, his finger happened upon a button. Click!

Using Belkin's Weird Powerstrips


The case opened up, and inside were 10 outlets — 6 little outlets, next to gold-plated coax, ethernet, and RJ-11 power filters, and room for 4 big blocks. All through the top of the case were nooks for cable routing, and a space to pass all the cords through the top. This was the perfect powerstrip for a livingroom, where the cables need to be tucked away nicely.

AND THEY LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER. THE END...FOR NOW. Dun dun DUUUUN.*
(I've been writing too many news pieces, lately. Had to break it up. Humor me.)

[Belkin]