The 12 Most Passive Aggressive Secret Santa Presents You Can Give This Year

It's bad enough that you have to deal with the mouth-breathers at your office five days a week. Now you've got to spend your hard-earned money on a Secret Santa present for them as well? Thank you, no. Express your displeasure with these fantastically snarky gift ideas.

The 12 Most Passive Aggressive Secret Santa Presents You Can Give This Year

CDs

Bonus points if they're AOL installation CDs. [Image: shutterstock]

The 12 Most Passive Aggressive Secret Santa Presents You Can Give This Year

A Journal

For when you want to tell your co-worker, "I give precisely zero fucks about your opinion so here, write your feelings down in this book. Then burn it." [Image: shutterstock]

The 12 Most Passive Aggressive Secret Santa Presents You Can Give This Year

VHS Boxsets

Because everybody loves legacy technology, right?

The 12 Most Passive Aggressive Secret Santa Presents You Can Give This Year

AAAA Batteries

Are these even a thing?

The 12 Most Passive Aggressive Secret Santa Presents You Can Give This Year

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The 12 Most Passive Aggressive Secret Santa Presents You Can Give This Year

Smoking Cessation Aids

Hint, Hint. [Image: shutterstock]

The 12 Most Passive Aggressive Secret Santa Presents You Can Give This Year

A Gym Membership

Because you're fat, fatty. [Image: shutterstock]

The 12 Most Passive Aggressive Secret Santa Presents You Can Give This Year

Spanx

Because you're fat, Ms. Fatty.

The 12 Most Passive Aggressive Secret Santa Presents You Can Give This Year

Match.com Subscription

It's either this or rent you a hooker.

The 12 Most Passive Aggressive Secret Santa Presents You Can Give This Year

Sweatpants

These rank just below socks and neck ties on the scale of shitty clothing to receive. [Image: shutterstock]

The 12 Most Passive Aggressive Secret Santa Presents You Can Give This Year

Applebees giftcard

Because Guy Fieri's American Bar and Grill is too good for you.

The 12 Most Passive Aggressive Secret Santa Presents You Can Give This Year

A Weight Watchers Subscription

You'll need it after all that Applebee's.

The 12 Most Passive Aggressive Secret Santa Presents You Can Give This Year

Breathe Right Anti-Snore Strips

A gentle reminder that maybe you shouldn't sleep while at work.