Instagram's private messaging service, Instagram Direct, is finally here. Why, though, with so many photo-messaging apps at our fingertips already, would you use a private channel for your filtered, edited, and enhanced brunches and sunsets? The same reason we do anything—sex. Dick pic, meet Kelvin.
To hear Instagram tell it, the photo service has become such a status symbol that users have begun meticulously self-censoring, posting only the coolest and most impressive shots for their followers to gawk over. But let's get real. Most of our Instagram feeds have become a hellscape of selfies, #ThrowbackThursdays, and 15-second videos of unmoving cats. The advent of the Instagram filter has made us lose our own, so we spew out photo-diarrhea for all the world to see.
At this point, the only thing that (most) people actually feel uncomfortable sharing with the masses are shots of their baby-making bits. So all of our filthy, photo-based sexts have been relegated to the worlds of text messaging and Snapchat, which, lets face it, don't always make it easy to highlight your best angle. Thanks to Instagram Direct, though, all that's about to change. The only reason to use it over any other photo messaging app is to sepia-tone your boobs and/or penis. And that's no small thing.
We already use Instagram to make our more typically visible body parts look like the best versions of themselves, so it's only a matter of time before it becomes the default for those looking to get into the old-timey dick pic game. Since you're guaranteed to only be immediately shown private photos from people you know, chances are anyone sending you a sext isn't someone you'd be inclined to flag for deletion. Finally, you can share your vintage-filtered naked body with those you care about and not worry about being reported to the Instagram powers that be.
Before you start unbuckling your pants, though, be forewarned: People can still take screenshots of private messages. So just like with traditional sexts, you'll probably want to hit send with caution, even if you're positive that Mayfair really does make Cap'n Johnson look his most regal
You can get all of less tawdry details on Instagram Direct down below, and friends, happy sexting.