This landline phone with an adorable unknown animal on it seems perfect for the phone-calling tyke in your life, but what's on the inside is truly scary. Its guts contain a voice-changing module with high- or low-pitch options, allowing you to choose between your inner Barry White and your inner Jared Wiley. Or your, you know, every kidnapper ever. It comes from world-famous shlock wholesaler Chinavision, so pick up one or five...hundred, starting at $10.27. [Chinavision via Crave]