The Iron Samurai watch, a spectacularly ugly bracelet-style watch made from "Samurai sword carbonized steel folded 1000x over," is available from Chinavision for a questionable $15. It also comes with one of the weirdest/funniest product descriptions I've ever seen.

The watch, a form of which we've previously seen as a concept, hides red LEDs inside the pattern of the bracelet, which is kind of cool in theory but dorktacular in practice. Some highlights from the bizarre product description:

[It has] blood red numerals encased in stark samurai sword steel like the final battle between all the forces of good and evil in the multiverse

Yes, The Iron Samurai has been known to increase its wearers' strength, dexterity, constitution, intelligence, wisdom, and charisma by as much as 20 points each! Chuck Norris and Steven Seagal are said to be Iron Samurai owners, as is David Bowie and Brian Eno. In reality, this watch is perfect for Presidential dinner crashers, Facebook celebs with over 1000 fans, Youtube directors with over 2,000,000 views, anyone who can play the entirety of Neil Zaza's I'm Alright on electric guitar, iPhone 3Gs owners, or anybody who is a somebody.


Yes, it's garish as all hell, but how many products can claim to be owned by both Steven Seagal and Brian Eno? [OhGizmo]

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