Out of the dark came fire, and it fascinated cave men through to the the small hours as they watched it flicker and burn, until they were tired to their bones. Then, there was the smartphone, and everyone stared a the glowing glass slabs until there was absolutely no hope of sleep whatsoever. [Doghouse Diaries]
Should we ever find the world in its death throes, one of the first orders of business will be establishing a new value system.
If you sometimes find it hard to read social situations and establish if it's an appropriate time to be taking photographs of yourself with your phone, here's a simple flowchart to make the decision making process a little easier. [Doghouse Diaries]
Wait, you use the semicolon for sentence construction? Are you for real? Surely, nobody really knows how to use that thing properly anymore. It's probably for the best that it's only ever used to form winky emoticons these days. [Doghouse Diaries]
What you type in your email says a lot about the kind of person you are—but what you add at the bottom of every message can be just as revealing. Your email signature can speak volumes about your personality.
The display on your phone is relatively tiny. But in pixels, it's friggin' huge. That's the beauty of high resolution. So how would that phone screen compare to your TV, or your tablet or your laptop if it was spread out to a similarly-sized screen? Doghouse Diaries made this graphic to show you, and it's kind of nuts…
Every country is Number One when it comes to something, and this map from webcomic Doghouse Diaries just what all those somethings are.
When's the last time you put all your eggs in one basket? Probably never. But! When's the last time you put all your data in one hard drive? Probably right now (you gotta learn better backup habits). And though we know that practice makes perfect and that patience is a virtue, what actually applies to real life is…
It seems as though every day we read (and write) about another amazing new breakthrough, be it medical, technological, epicurean, or other. And then we wait... and wait... and wait... and... hey, just a minute. Where'd that quantum computer go?
When we tell the future children of the world that you shouldn't judge a book by its cover, they'll stare at their iPad and wonder what the hell a book is. Does that old fart mean an app? When we tell them to scratch our back and we'll scratch theirs, they'll wonder why are we even talking to each other in IRL. And…
We can argue about Android fragmentation and conflicting standards all day long, but you know what? Those fights are nothing compared to how broken your own digital life is.
The phone book. There's perhaps no more outmoded, unnecessary, downright wasteful collection of printed information in the known universe. But Doghouse Diaries has a few suggestions that might make them useful after all.
It's always felt like something's missing from your local public bathroom's hand dryer tutorial. Something simple, yet crucial. Something like, say, this missing third step that Doghouse Diaries has so smartly proposed.
Whatever energy you spend fussing with your microwave, testing out different power levels and durations, is wasted. It's about time you knew that. Because despite all your efforts, your food can only come out one of two ways: ice-cold, or mouth-singeing.
Our children won't know what life was like before smartphones took over our every waking hour. But when you inevitably try to gather them around to tell them about all the time we spent not staring at screens? Well, as Doghouse Diaries points out, good luck with that:
Any list that weighs the pros and cons of the internet can only end one way: the realization that you're wasting your life... right... now. Although to be honest, there's way more in the plus column here than I ever would have imagined possible.
NASA's ability to land a gigantic rover on the surface of Mars? Impressive. The fact that it did so for less money than AT&T spent on building cell towers last year? The best evidence yet that we're putting our faith in the wrong people.
Oh, man, the iPad? I totally thought of that back in 1998. And good for you! Here's a handy flow chart that explains exactly why no one cares. Which I totally thought of drawing up myself last fall. [Doghouse Diaries]
Come on, already. You know that fancy away message isn't going to protect you. You can sass it up with as much urgency and/or bile as you want, but the yo-yos are still going to come knocking. And you know what? It's your own fault for not doing an Invisible ninja vanish when you had the chance. [The Doghouse Diaries]
Look, I don't care how many of you Like the debt ceiling compromise or write on Ron Paul's wall. Facebook's not going to have any real political impact until we start being able to measure candidates by the quality of their FarmVille trades. [The DougHouse Diaries]
