The world imploded when it was discovered that Republican presidential hopeful Jeb! was selling a cheap plastic bowl for $75 (especially seeing as one could buy 24 of the same cheap plastic bowls for $36). But it’s not the most egregious product being sold by a candidate. Just in time for tonight’s debates, here are worse things you can buy than a Guaca Bowle.


Marco Rubio | $45-48

Marco?


Rand Paul | $1000

“If you would like a signed Constitution in neatly bound book, contribute $1,000 and we will send you one.”


Mike Huckabee | $20

“We don’t recommend this, but we know you’ll be able to wear this shirt with pride”


Scott Walker | $299

A Nation’s Challenge


Ted Cruz | $10

“In stock”


Hillary Clinton | $10

Amirite?


Donald Trump | $25

“The Official Make America Great Again classic rope hat as worn by Donald J. Trump himself”


Chris Christie | Free

He doesn’t sell merch but he does have these.