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These Avengers dildos are presumably Earth’s Mightiest Vibrators

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Sorry, fans of pop culture-themed sexual aids. I regret to inform you these Avengers vibrators aren’t real, but instead concepts designed by artist Balazs Sarmai that badly need to become real. Come, let’s assemble the team!

In case you have any trouble reading the type, these heroic helpers are specified as follows:

• Captain America – silicon vibrator
• Iron Man – twin motor vibrator
• Thor – electrical stimulator
• Hulk – 12” silicone dildo
• Black Widow – discreet clitoral stimulator
• Hawkeye – G-spot vibrator

Honestly, Marvel should totally license these; they’d sell a bundle (possibly literally in some cases). But they should make sure to include a Tom Hiddleston/Loki version, too — based on most of the Avengers fan art and fan fic I’ve seen, I’m pretty sure a green-and-yellow Vibrator of Mischief would be the #1 seller by a considerable margin.

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