Yesterday I went to Toy Fair here in NYC to check out what sorts of tie-ins Hasbro has planned for the upcoming Transformers Movie, and boy was I underwhelmed. Sure, I might be a good decade and a half beyond their target market here, but I know what kids like. And they like accurate representation of their favorite fantasy franchise's mythologies.

Take a look at this Optimus Prime transformer. It changes from an 18-wheeler… to a gun?! Hello, that's what Megatron transforms into. Haven't you ever seen the near-unwatchable, seizure-inducing animated movie from the early 80's?

What else was at the Transformers booth?


Toy Fair 2007: Optimus Prime Transforms Into Profit

There was this helmet that changes your voice to sound like Optimus Prime, which was kind of cool. It clearly wasn't going to fit on my gargantuan noggin, but if I had a smaller head I'm sure I'd have minutes and minutes of fun making myself sound like a robot.


Toy Fair 2007: Optimus Prime Transforms Into Profit

There were also much larger dolls action figures of both Optimus Prime and Bumblebee. They both actually transformed from vehicle to robot, at least in theory — both the figures I saw were "just models" and couldn't actually transform. But hey, they looked pretty cool.

Toy Fair 2007: Optimus Prime Transforms Into Profit

I also got taken into a special back room where I wasn't allowed to take photos. What amazing things lay behind that closed door? Transformers branded children's clothing, such as sweatpants! OMG! Also, smaller action figures of all sorts of Transformers in the movie that haven't been seen/revealed yet, which was pretty neat, I guess. Also: Transformers Risk! Transformers: the DVD game! And all sorts of other crap that seems overly optimistic about the social impact of a Michael Bay movie! Get excited!