What a piece of shit...

Bono: Hurry up already! I have to take huge dump!

They're paying me to be their friend.

Ok, a little closer Bill, Mike. And now Bono, I need you to squat, yup, squat down, that's it. Ok too far, this isn't 2 girls 1 cup, you can come back up a little.

Great, we got it, that's a wrap.

Who took my IPOD?

"My stage presence would be so much better with a collared shirt and sweater. Yeah yeah yeah!" -Bono, speaking in jealousy of Gates.

Bono: My screen is bigger than yours
Bill: my wallet is fatter than yours
Bono: I've had more sex than you can buy
Bill: No you haven't
Michael: What am i doing here?
Bill: Shut up
Michael: you shut up...

I think Bill and Michael are grabbing Bono's arse.

Elephant walk these guys...

Who wears a blue sweater to a Project (Red) event!?

"Suundaaay Bloody Suuundaaaayyy!"

Weirdly, all of their careers began in a garage.

I hope nobody can see my Bono under this blue sweater

Bill Gates, Bono and Michael Dell walk into a bar...

And Stve Jobs ducks.

Presenting the 2008 finalists for the (red) Awkward Smiles Contest.

"I wish Gates would stop calling me 'Sting' ".

They all look so uncool but in completely different ways.

Bill: OH fuck, Bono's grabbing my inner thigh - must... try... to smile...

Bono: What's.. who are these people? fuck Im so gakked can't feel my thigh.

Michael: Ma i cant wait to bust out that peruvian shit bono sold to me - i better act like i have to go to the bathroom...

for the love of Christ, bill gates!! You're a gazillionare! Its time you stopped shopping at wal-mart for your clothes. Atleast take it up a step on go to target....

Who's this "Robin Williams" they keep calling me?

Gates' sweater was actually slate grey, but it managed to get a BSOD (text on the back, of course).

Oh, and Bono looks that uncomfortable because they required him to take the pole OUT of his hind end for the picture. I guess when you're used to it...

Three creepy a-holes. Nice Yoko Ono glasses, Bon-Bon.

Bono: oh...a little poop came out on that one
Gates: that's awefull. how long do i need to stand here and smile?
Dell: i like it. it's hearty.

singing, "...i'm stuck in a moment that i can't get out of..."

Bono: "Bill please move your hand!"

Bono has finally convinced Bill and Michael that communism is the way forward to end world hunger. A red Zune will be released in the summer, and Bill is courting Hugo Chavez for a V.P of Global Distribution position.

Bill: Bono just let us go! You'll never get away with this we -

Bono: You better STFU and smile - no funny business when the camera comes on

Mike: What do you want from -

Bono: Just STFU, and smile, smile like i'm shafting you and you don't like it - yeah yeah yeah!

Bill - "Hey Bono, you wanna trade glasses for a little while?

Bono - "Uhhh, no."

Michael - "God, this is a total sausage-fest. Where da bitches at?"

Bill: "Hey guys..does anyone else think the logos behind us look like boobs?"

Bono: Seeing RED.

"We are all obscenely rich and you hate Africans you money hungry prols!"

Bill: That logo behind us looks like boobies!
Michael: Uh huh huh huh, yeah! Boobies!
Bill and Michael: Uh huh huh huh huh!
...
Bono: Get me the hell outta here.

Dell looks like a long lost Romney brother. I want to talk smack about Gates so bad but the Bill and Melinda Foundation is doing so much good. So does Bono, but I can't help but to want to slap the hip outta him.

PHOTOGRAPHER: "WAIT!", "Freeze!"
"Gentlemen, hold that pose, it's GREAT!"
"DAMMIT, Angola, get over here with those"
"Gentlemen, this'll be PERFECT. My assistant will help you into your colour-co-ordinated foam noses"
"PERFECT!"

Windows Vista on a Dell:

"I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For"

Bono: "No way in bloody hell do these gizmodo readers give a shit about whats happening in Afica ... They're probably trying to make fun of our threesome pic right now."

one ball in each claw

Bono: First things first: WHERE'S YOUR SHITTER? I've got a turtle-head poking out.
Gates: Charming
Bono: I'm not kiddin'. I've got a crap on deck that could choke a donkey. Aww, it's SQUIDGY. Christ, I'm gettin' all emotional from it, ya know?

Boner: I don't have try too hard to look "cooler" than these two.
I'm an artist damn it, I use a Mac! ~~Gawd~~This is going to kill my rep over at Apple.

Approximately 1 out of 3 men over the age of 40 have mild to severe erection problems. Guess who couldn't get it up last night?

I've had it with these motherfucking geeks on these motherfucking screens!

Bill Gates is rubbing up on Bono a little too much.

Representing the reptile class we have three of the four orders: the turtles, the snakes and the crocodiles...

Bill and Michael are thinking RED...

But Bono is thinking "Arby's"

Rose colored glasses make red things disappear!

Bono: This isn't what I meant when I said I wanted to bury my face between some boobs.

"$360 million, Bill? Plus the Foundation? I'd have to sell my wine collection to be that generous"

Bill: You could cut the sexual tension in here with a knife.
Bono: Bloody hell Bill, I swear to fucking God if you sing "the sweetest thing" in my ear one more time, I am going to go...
Dell: I was told that there would be food here...Wait, I can't believe Bill wore the same shirt as me AGAIN. Either way Bono, dude you are so getting a Dell.

you can tell Bill is thinking "what smells like a giant piece of crap?" but just keeps smiling.

Bono(thinking): I sure hope that's a pocket protector I feel on my back.

Dell Photographer (on the phone with head of Dell Marketing): Did you get the picture I sent?...Yeah...No, I know...I totally agree they screw up the picture..Yeah I marked the two we should photoshop OUT with (RED) over their heads. We don't want to give anyone any more of a reason to NOT buy our over-priced computers especially if its for charity.

Hey Bill, you can take your thumb out of my ass any time now.

1) I guess Bill didn't get the memo about U2 REALLY not having any open spots.
2) I wish this photo was actually a video. That way, you'd be able to see Jay-Z coming into the picture and bitch-slapping all three of them.
3) You know how (Product) RED started don't you? Michael and Bill saw the light coming shining from Bono's ass and went towards it.

Jeremy Clarkson FTW!!
4) Worst. Caption. Contest. Ever. But yeah I got nothing...

or... Explain again... why does this one cost more than the black one?

Upon further investigation...

5) Bono actually initiated the deal in exchange for being taught how to count in Spanish properly.

Red? These look the same color as every other thing I see.

marry, boff, kill: Dell, gates, bono

[www.nbc.com]

A Bono Between the (red)tm Gates of Dell

Bono: Bill, John Edwards can afford a $400 haircut. When are you going to stop letting Melinda cut your hair at the kitchen table? And will you please either get lasik or some decent glasses?

Bill: Shut up and smile or I'll shove this Zune further up your ass.

Michael: God, I've lost $10 billion personally since my stock dropped by a third in the last two months. This Prozac is good stuff .

What? We're not looking at porn.

Two Giant Nerds and an International Superstar (on left)

why has bono got his schlong on the table (under the xps one to the right)!?!?

"A nerd, a yuppie and Robins Williams walk into a bar..."

Even WITH the Members Only jacket, Bono knew he just didn't fit in.

In the fight against AIDS, doctors have some powerful tools at their disposal... And here are three powerful tools in one sitting.

Bill: "Quick Mike! If we hurry we can get a pic with Bono while he's not paying attention!"
Mike: "Sounds good, but quick let's carry some of my computer stuff over there..."
Bono: "Aww crap...here come those 2 computer geeks again."

"NERD ALERT!"

Bono: hey Bill, is that a pocket protector I feel on my back, or are you just happy to see me?