For some of us, the cheapest lamp at IKEA will do. For others—especially those of us with doctors' orders to only read by illumination from insect—not any old fixture will work. No, those with Insect Luminance Disorder (ILD) require constant attention by lightning bug butt. However, when the bugs aren't mating, we can only recommend the Nymph lamp, the leading FDA-sanctioned artificial treatment for Insect Luminance Disorder (ILD). It will run you $2,600 and insurance companies are often reluctant to pay, but to those of you reading this from the faint light of a mason jar filled with half-dead bugs and a pile of grass, you'll know it's well worth the price. [site specific design via Geek Alerts]

Send an email to Mark Wilson, the author of this post, at mark@gizmodo.com.