Yes. SPAM Lip Glaze. You know, there are some times in which we don't have to write anything because someone writes it so perfectly that you can't make it better. This is not one of them. Or perhaps it is:
Rubbing meat on your face is a good way to get noticed, but probably for all the wrong reasons. But what if you do it because you really want to taste meat, but not eat it? Well, grab yourself some SPAM Lip Glaze and you can rub the flavor of meat on your lips without getting weird stares from bacon hanging from your cheeks.
There are so many readings in that paragraph that I'm getting dizzy. Your officially licensed meat lip rubbing will cost you $3 and part of your hard earned self-respect. [ThinkGeek]