Sounds like somebody's got a case of the Mondays. Reuters reports that an unemployed Austrian man was so dead-set against returning to work he lopped off his left foot.
The unidentified 56-year-old was set to meet with a labor board to evaluate his fitness to return to the Austrian workforce on Monday when the mutilation occurred. The victim (assailant?) reportedly set his left leg atop an electric saw in his home workshop and went to town, completely severing the foot just above the ankle.
Not content to leave well enough alone, the man then hobbled/bled to his kitchen and threw his foot in the oven before calling for an ambulance. Doctors were unable to reattach the foot.
While his dedication and thoroughness are commendable—who thinks to cook their own foot to prevent its reattachment?—you'd think he could have just gotten a doctor's note or, you know, sucked it up. It's called "work" and not "superhappyohmygodthisisthebesthingofalltime" for a reason buddy, nobody likes it.