Nokia. Nokia, Nokia. You were doing things well. You made a smartphone that was well received, and looked nothing like an iPhone. People liked it. People are buying it. And then you created a video parody of Rack City. Nokia...

The video—which director Aaron Perkins Jr. says was shot at a Nokia office in Boston—is without a doubt, the worst thing of its kind. It makes the Windows Phone 7 sorority rap squad look like Lil Kim. It makes us cringe to the point that our faces might implode and create a black hole.

The following things are in this video:

  • A guy saying "dev city kid, dev dev city kid" over and over
  • Ironic, stupid, horribly tired "WHITE GUY DOING ZANY RAP THING" tropes
  • A limousine from a bad prom
  • Multiple soul patches
  • A slob in a hoodie and fedora
  • "I want a Lumia in my pocket so I'm ready to win"
  • Nokia. You just made Tyga actually look cool.

    You could have spent the amount of money it took to produce this sensory war crime and maybe bribe Pandora into making a Windows Phone app. Or just, I don't know, set the money on fire.

    Update: Nokia tells us it's "investigating this video internally," which means, wow, Aaron Perkins Jr. has gone off the rails. Maybe Nokia isn't totally responsible for this advertisement mushroom cloud.