I Don't Care How Cool VR Is, Please Just Propose IRL

Image: YouTube
Image: YouTube

You know what’s cool about finding someone you’re actually into? Holding hands. Making out. Gazing into each other’s (actual) eyes. You know where you can’t do these things? In the void. So why the hell are people proposing in virtual reality?

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For some inexplicable reason, people keep taking a tender moment and strapping some hardware on it. The latest VR proposal to go viral involves a guy inserting a reproduction of his girlfriend’s “favourite, happy place” in a zombie shooting game. Which is sweet, sure, but you can literally go anywhere in the world. You can go to Mars! If you’re going to make the love of your life sport a clunky face gadget when you ask them one of the most important questions of their life, at least take them to Mars.

Image: YouTube
Image: YouTube
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Understandably, her immediate response to this grand gesture was, “Can I take my thing off?”

If your relationship was built on a love for technology, specifically virtual reality, I can understand the temptation to incorporate it into your proposal. The technology has promised us wonder and whimsy unavailable to our humble naked eyes. But as it exists in its current state, virtual reality does not afford users with the type of closeness that, well, real life does. You know what’s better than an avatar slightly resembling your partner and a vibrating glove to simulate their touch? Their actual face and their actual hands.

Our relationships are already overrun by technology. It’s hard to watch the rare human moments untouched by electronic mediation taken over by even more tech. Unless you are an actual computer or the love of your life is geographically inaccessible, preserve the scarce fleshy wonders of the world, and propose in real life.

And if love makes you sick, try experiencing it with lag.

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