Trot ON, Hortensia! This is the iJoyRide, a fitness machine that thinks it's a horse. It's got four speeds (Warm Up, Taking It Easy, Getting Serious and Pump It Up) and 30 minutes on it will burn the same amount of calories as a 30-min run or bike ride. Wannabe mustang riders could probably play Pimp My iJoyRide and turn it into a rodeo bulls to practice on. It's yours for $770 and all the embarrassment in the world.