Laser Walls Unnecessarily Update the Stoplight

Illustration for article titled Laser Walls Unnecessarily Update the Stoplight

This Virtual Wall concept replaces stoplights with a much larger, more expensive way to notify drivers that if they don't stop, their wheel wells will become clogged with pedestrians. It essentially creates a big wall of lasers across the road with images of pedestrians, making the red light pretty much impossible to miss. Of course, such a thing would hinder visibility into the intersection while stopped, will be a huge energy waste and will cost a retarded amount of taxpayer money to install, but hey, it looks so neat! Lasers! The future is now! [Yanko Design]


"AHHHHHH Honey!! LOOK OUT!! There's giant people crossing the street!!!"


"Why are you yelling at me?!?! Don't you think I can see these enormous red idiots?"

"Well, if you weren't on your cell phone blabbing to your mom about the stupid puppy parade I MIGHT have slight confidence in your driving. And I can hear her on the other end talking shit about me.. you've got that damned volume up so high, Big Red over there can hear her cackle."

"Cackle?!?! Cackle!?!? My mother does not cackle. She was so right about you."

"Right about what?! That I stop at intersections with red lights the size of our house?!?! Cuz if that's what she said then fuck me sideways your mother's a genius. But if she said that I stay stopped when the big red wall turns into a big green "GO!" then she's just as big of a goblin as her daughter turned out to be. Now GO!"

"You are unbelievable.. un.... unbelievable."