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Chocolate Master Chief Penis Helmet

It’s a chocolate helmet. Shaped like Master Chief. For your penis. Yes, that Master Chief. Or as the site calls him, “The One Eyed Spartan.” As if dressing up junior as a viking or Indiana Jones wasn’t silly enough. Reserve yours today for $7.95! [Chocolate Party Hats via The Raw Feed]

Tech News Jason Chen

Glittering Nano-Crystals Eat Carbon and Save the World

Wired has just posted an amazing gallery devoted to the production of these envirotastic nano-crystals that absorb carbon dioxide. Each crystal can absorb up to 80 times its own volume in carbon dioxide. UCLA researcher Omar Yaghi says these particular crystals could be used for carbon capture technologies in green engines, sucking up carbon before…

io9 Annalee Newitz

CyCool Uses Your Own Cycling Energy To Cool You

Stationary biking may be fun and healthy, but unless you’re sitting right under an air conditioning vent, you’re gonna get hot. Real hot. So why not use the energy generated by all that furious pedaling to power a fan that cools you off at the same time? Sounds brilliant to us as long as you…

Tech News Jason Chen

“If Mail Can Be Shot Through a Tube Why Not Meals?”

From his first job at Scientific American circa 1900 to his retirement in 1956 as science editor at the New York Times, Waldemar Kaempffert wrote widely about the sciences. As you might imagine from the man who penned yesterday’s Popular Mechanics article, Kaempffert was a man with grand plans for a future world made better…

io9 Lynn Peril

PlayStation Eye Tracks Your Face As You Dodge, Duck, Dip, Dive and Dodge

Last week at GDC, Sony showed how the standard PlayStation Eye camera connected to a standard PS3 does well at tracking face and body movement, even at some distance. As you can see in the above video starring my good friend Stephen Totilo, it works great, and would be brilliant for duck-and-cover maneuvering in first-person…

Tech News Wilson Rothman

What’s Really The Worst Thing Trek Brought To Scifi?

Many of our readers were outraged yesterday when we suggested the “reset button” was the worst thing Star Trek had inflicted on science fiction. How dare we single out the reset button, when there are so many other horrendous things which Trek had brought to the genre? Like the holodeck, the bumpy foreheads, and the…

io9 Charlie Jane Anders

Turbine Ad Showcases a Bored, Possibly Brain Damaged Troublemaker

This ad for Epuron Wind Power won the prize for best film advertising at the International Advertising Festival in Cannes this past summer, and you can see why: it’s downright wonderful. While we’ve recently seen the destructive power of the wind as it wreaks havoc on one poor turbine, it’s nice to see the wind…

Gadgets Adam Frucci

A Faithful Reconstruction of A.E.R. Pipewell’s Time Machine

A reclusive scientist named A.E.R. Pipewell may have disappeared without much notice during World War I, but to his contemporaries Nikola Tesla and Thomas Edison he was something of a legend. Sadly, most of his workshop was destroyed in the San Francisco earthquake and fire of 1906, but recently some of his schematics came to…

io9 Annalee Newitz

LG’s 10000:1 Contrast Ratio Monitor

Most of us might find a 10000:1 contrast ratio monitor from LG with Digital Fine Contrast technology overkill for writing Facebook entries or watching YouTube, but college students—who watch full-length pirated movies on their computer every day—will find this extremely useful. And since a higher contrast ratio means blacks are much blacker (though, sometimes losing…

Tech News Jason Chen

Glitter Gun – For The Times When You Want to Get Whored Up Really, Really Fast

Much like Homer’s makeup gun, this Glitter Gun allows you to apply sparkly bits to your woman in record time, allowing long waits on the couch while she’s getting ready to become a thing of the past. The gun is a bit tricky, however, seeing as one glitter shot is not quite enough, and two…

Tech News Jason Chen

Captain America Teaches English Lessons — With His Fists

The Red Skull sounds like Tweety Bird with a fakey Italian accent in this awesome clip from the original live-action Captain America movie. All the Skull wants is some English lessons, but instead Captain America kicks his ass, only to wind up strapped to a silly-looking Nazi rocket. The scene ends with the obligatory villain…

io9 Charlie Jane Anders

Camel Cigarette Phone Probably Won’t Fool Anyone

If you were of the 598 landline-only Giz readers, you should probably hide your embarrassing lack of technology. This $49 touchtone phone disguises your relic as a pack of death sticks. It looks accurate, but your bluff will probably be called when people notice that it’s connected to the wall or remember you don’t actually…

Tech News Eric Sheline

The Genetic History Of GATTACA

A collector’s edition of GATTACA will be out in two weeks, and it’s getting the full Blu-ray treatment from Sony. Maybe this box-office flop will finally get the respect that it deserves, especially now that we’re getting closer and closer to being able to build superhumans. Find out more about the strange and awesome history…

io9 Kevin Kelly

USB Runner Hub Reminds You Of Your Lateness

Do you need a constant reminder that you’re always late? Perhaps in a four-port USB hub form? Then this USB Running Man Hub is the perfect gift for your birthday, with its four distinct USB 2.0 ports in the guy’s base, arm, leg and briefcase. No? You wanted a nose hair trimmer instead? Guess that’s…

Tech News Jason Chen

The Dark Knight Walks Through Fire

Batman doesn’t even need this new-fangled 3-D technology to punch through your screen. He just needs the awesome power of his Bat-fist, judging from this new promo still from the upcoming Batman: Gotham Knight animated DVD, coming this summer. Click through for two more awesome images, including one that shows Batman walking through fire and…

io9 Charlie Jane Anders

Living Neural Networks Could Drive War Machines

Soldiers will control battlesuits using their own nerve impulses, thanks to artificially grown human nervous systems. Cybering lovers could control sex toys over the net and “feel” when they’re touched, using the same biotechnology. Researchers at the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine have succeeded in growing a miniature human nervous system in culture, inside…

io9 Charlie Jane Anders

Write for io9!

At last, we’re ready to bring in some new writers at io9. We’re looking for people to fill two roles: entertainment writer and science writer. For the entertainment writer, we want somebody who can cover the entertainment side of science fiction, who has contacts in the scifi film, TV, and/or game industries, and can break…

io9 Annalee Newitz

Lost Promises Two More Boring Seasons

Showrunners Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse have outlined the end of Lost all the way through season six, and it sounds like you might want to check out Watching Paint Dry on the DIY Channel instead. Learn how Lost ends, after the jump. https://gizmodo.com/red-hot-kissing-pic-from-next-weeks-lost-360727 According to Lindelof, “Season 4 is about who gets off the…

io9 Kevin Kelly

Apple Event for the iPhone SDK: March 6th

Click to viewLooks like the delay was true: an invite for the launch of the iPhone SDK came in, and it’s showing a Town Hall event on Cupertino campus on March 6th. The mail includes a reference to “some exciting new enterprise features” as well. Research In Motion should be as excited as we are.…

Tech News Brian Lam

Dreamworks Still Tied to HD DVD’s Corpse By Toshiba Contract

Okay, so one big studio actually hasn’t made the jump to Blu yet: Dreamworks, which was paid $100 million to join HD DVD back in August. As we had pieced together in our closed-door analysis, they can’t break rank until Toshiba lets them. Says Dreamworks chief: “It really is in their court at this point…

Gadgets Matt Buchanan

Chocolate Master Chief Penis Helmet

Glittering Nano-Crystals Eat Carbon and Save the World

CyCool Uses Your Own Cycling Energy To Cool You

“If Mail Can Be Shot Through a Tube Why Not Meals?”

PlayStation Eye Tracks Your Face As You Dodge, Duck, Dip, Dive and Dodge

What’s Really The Worst Thing Trek Brought To Scifi?

Turbine Ad Showcases a Bored, Possibly Brain Damaged Troublemaker

A Faithful Reconstruction of A.E.R. Pipewell’s Time Machine

LG’s 10000:1 Contrast Ratio Monitor

Glitter Gun – For The Times When You Want to Get Whored Up Really, Really Fast

Captain America Teaches English Lessons — With His Fists

Camel Cigarette Phone Probably Won’t Fool Anyone

The Genetic History Of GATTACA

USB Runner Hub Reminds You Of Your Lateness

The Dark Knight Walks Through Fire

Living Neural Networks Could Drive War Machines

Write for io9!

Lost Promises Two More Boring Seasons

Apple Event for the iPhone SDK: March 6th

Dreamworks Still Tied to HD DVD’s Corpse By Toshiba Contract

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