McCain Says He'll Choose Vice-President Via Google

Illustration for article titled McCain Says He'll Choose Vice-President Via Google

Hi, John McCain here.

You might know me, I'm the Republican candidate for this year's presidential race. However, I'm not yet in possession of a Number Two to ride that ticket alongside me. Earlier this week, I told people at a luncheon party in Virginia that I was using the power of the Google in order to find myself a vice-president. Trouble is, I just don't know who to pick.

First thought was Thrillary, then someone reminded me she was on a different side of the fence than me. Still, we might get the anti-Obama vote wrapped up that way. Young and dynamic, someone said, then I started panicking. Trouble is, I don't know anyone young and dynamic. I mean, 50 years ago, when I was young and dynamic, I knew young and dynamic people. But, sheesh, now? Hell, I couldn't tell you. I tried using Google, but typing "Dear Mr Google, please could you help me choose a veep, please?" didn't really work. So I thought I should turn to those young and dynamic readers of Gizmodo, perhaps they could help me find the Toto to my Dorothy.


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I'm A Different Bird

@gadgetplay: No, you'll see a mix of uninsured people with minor ailments clogging up the system for people with actual emergencies, and uninsured people with life-threatening ailments that started as minor ailments and would have stayed that way with proper treatment (that they couldn't afford). And regardless, they will not be getting it for free; have you seen the kind of bill they send you after an emergency room visit? It's in the thousands of dollars. One visit pretty much torpedoes a poor, uninsured person's credit rating (since they'll never be able to pay it), but when it's your credit rating or your life, guess what people choose? Of course, when they don't pay, prices on healthcare go up for the rest of us to recoup the losses; thus, considering the expense of the treatments that are necessary for some of these folks, it might actually be CHEAPER to give people free medical care in the first place, rather than making them go through this whole song and dance.

I can't believe you thought the emergency room was free. Where the hell do you live, crazy no-way land?