Save the paper and dice for the poor, when we dork out to tabletop RPGs, we need plenty of money and electricity. Here's a custom tabletop that has a built-in computer, individually lit stations for dice rolls, some cool metal ball thingies, and a tube network for secret DM messages (delivered in ball thingies). Goblets optional.
And check out another tabletop featuring Infocus 425z projector hooked up to the DM's laptop for bright and beautiful dungeoning. We've sort of mentioned this one before.
Now all these tables need is a panic button, swapping the top with the green felt of a poker table. It won't explain your cloak, but it might keep your girlfriend a bit more at ease.