You stand unblinking, knife dripping with blood, above a dead 15-year-old Hitler. You have done what so many before you couldn’t (including Tom Cruise, whose recent movie was an autobiographical account of his own attempt).
Suddenly, you feel your facial hair slowly sprouting, and one testicle slowly shrinking away to nothing. You rush to a mirror. The color drains suddenly from your face as you realize that nature’s tendency to self-correct wins out in the end.
YOU are now Hitler.