Vatican Claims the Nasty Internet Is Creating More Satanists

So anyway, the Vatican says the Internet is creating more Satanists than ever because it makes information so damn accessible or something, and the whole thing inspired me to write a new headline for the Telegraph piece where I learned of this terrifying phenomenon:

"Organization responsible for spreading the word about an invisible man in the sky and something called The End of Days claims the Internet, a real thing that exists presumably because of that man in the sky, is responsible for making more people believe in an evil, invisible man in a fiery realm below the ground.

I really have no clue why an organized religion would want to criticize something that makes information more freely available to the masses. No clue whatsoever.

That said, in hindsight my attempt was, admittedly, kind of long. You try! [Telegraph, Photo: Simon Norfolk]