New Year's Eve is the Las Vegas of holidays: An overhyped, boozy moneypit beloved by thirsty amateurs and precision-engineered to facilitate paralyzing morning-after regrets that are only tolerable if you're 10000% booty-faced. There is no app that will make it *good* but some apps can make it less bad.
To start though, the absolute worst app you can use on New Year's Eve is Uber, for several reasons. Surge prices will add a sad, fat credit card charge that will get your 2015 off to a financially irresponsible start. You will likely incur those reprehensible surge fees on your way to some bar charging a $50 cover, further dicking your bank account over. Also, Uber is run by dirtbags.
We have a list of alternatives if you really want to order a car, but if you want to have a non-trashcan beginning to 2015, but here are some apps that will help your night be better overall:
Never be too drunk to correctly tip your bartender, especially your bartender soldiering through Ultimate Bartender Hell Night. There are a bunch of different options, like Tip Calculator % Free for iOS or Tip N Split for Android. Doesn't really matter which one you use as long as you don't start off the new year being a huge cheapskate.
The simplest way to be reimbursed if someone barfs vodka on your dress.
If you must document one year ticking into the next, Instagram's timelapse app is the best way to do it.
Seamless will help you have the perfect New Year's Eve by ensuring that you will not have to leave your house to procure tasty foodstuffs. I recommend eating something very spicy. The phoenix burns in an act of rebirth, and so must your tongue. 2015 is the year of thoroughly cleaning your tongue with fire.
If you insist on going out in public and socializing instead of hunkering down like a wise-yet-ornery mountain hermit and you want to drive to the whole human interaction thing, use Waze. The crowdsourced traffic-mapping app will help you avoid holiday traffic and help you avoid starting your year off wanting to karate-chop everyone on the freeway.
Public transit is not as convenient as jumping in a car, but if you use an app that tracks public transit, like TransitTimes, you can make the experience as easy as possible. These apps will help you minimize your time on a cold subway platform or bus stop while maximizing your time not taking fuckin Uber.
For when you want to drown out the persistent chorus of Auld Lang Syne with something—anything!—else.
Perhaps our most important ally in the fight against leaving the house on New Year's Eve. Watch 12 Angry Men before it disappears on New Year's Day.
Photo via Creative Commons