Cards Against Humanity Sells Out Promotion to Screw Up Donald Trump's Border Wall in First Day

Photo: AP
Photo: AP

Cards Against Humanity, the nerd-beloved party game which asks players to respond to a variety of Mad Lib-style prompts with extremely offensive words and phrases, is famous for promotions like selling unsuspecting fans boxes of literal shit. This year, it’s upping the ante (and paying for goodwill with well-meaning liberals who might otherwise feel bad about playing it) with a six-part, $15 holiday promotion claiming to earn participants a role in the #Resistance.


The first round of the Cards Against Humanity Saves America promotion offers participants the chance to take part in a crowdsourced buyout of U.S.-Mexico border land supposedly right in the way of President Donald Trump’s increasingly mythical border wall. On its website, the cardmaker explained that it had bought acres of the land and was parceling out slices to customers, and claimed to have contracted a law firm to make any government attempt to claim it as painful as possible:

Donald Trump is a preposterous golem who is afraid of Mexicans. He is so afraid that he wants to build a twenty-billion dollar wall that everyone knows will accomplish nothing. So we’ve purchased a plot of vacant land on the border and retained a law firm specializing in eminent domain to make it as time-consuming and expensive as possible for the wall to get built.

Could CAH be the final straw that breaks Trump’s wall in half? Probably not, given that the president has already outlined numerous and ludicrous technical requirements for the unfunded project, such as it being impregnable, covered in solar panels, invisible, up to 65 feet tall so no one will throw over drugs and “hit somebody on the head,” and paid for by the Mexican government. Also, the Department of Homeland Security’s dubiously scientific prototypes look stupid as hell and not “beautiful” as promised, because it’s a damn wall:

Photo: AP
Photo: AP

So Trump probably doesn’t need the help tanking the project. But this promotion does seem to have been exceptionally effective at helping CAH make money, as all 150,000 slots offered on the first day were sold out by before midnight on Tuesday. Five more surprises are supposedly coming down the road, and it’s possible the company will offer more surprise slots to partake.


"... An upperclassman who had been researching terrorist groups online." - Washington Post

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Before people start crying “eminent domain”

It’s a REALLY lengthy legal process that could throw off the wall construction for actual years. CAH has them by the balls with this one. They can’t build around them or through them.

Make no mistake eminent domain could/would fix this, but CAH knows this. They are being a thorn in the side at worst; at best, they could save us from this stupid wall with years of legal disputes and delays until a new administration comes in and cancels the project entirely.