Old people have been engaging in wild Pokémon-related hijinks as of late, which is not a sentence I expected to be typing in the year of our lord 2026. But the 30th anniversary card set released this month has sent both fans and scalpers of all ages into a frenzy, and outlets around the world have been reporting fistfights, mail theft, and all manner of other unedifying behavior amongst those trying to get their hands on the new release.
Even by the standards of the last couple of months, a story that broke this week about one Kent Kubasta of Wooster, Ohio, stands out. First, the facts: Kubasta was convicted of placing an illegal GPS tracker on a delivery driver’s van so that he could track when and where said driver was making deliveries of Pokémon cards. As Aftermath notes, the driver found the device attached to her car while dropping off packs of cards at a local Walmart back in June. She contacted police, and Kubasta was arrested and charged with the illegal use of a tracking device or application, a criminal misdemeanor under Ohio law, admitting that he’d placed the device so that he could track her deliveries.
The court documents show that Kubasta initially pled not guilty and was set to stand before Judge Michael Rickett for a bench trial, but at the pre-trial hearing on August 31, he changed his mind, pleading no contest. He was duly convicted, fined $500 plus costs, and placed on 12 months’ probation, including three months with a GPS monitor (which runs you another $950 in Ohio, it seems). He was also ordered to have no contact with the victim. The sentencing docket also refers to a “sincere apology letter to victim”, which is “to be sent to Probation and forwarded to the victim”, although it’s not 100% clear composing such a letter is a requirement, or whether Kubasta had already written it and was asking for it to be passed on.
Either way, using a GPS device to stalk someone is frightening, creepy, and illegal for very good reason. Now, using a GPS to stalk someone so you know where to buy Pokémon cards is frightening, creepy, illegal for very good reason, and… kind of pathetic, really. I mean, for a start, Kubasta is 72 years old, which… look, if you’re a septuagenarian whose name is appearing in court documents that also mention Pokémon cards, then you really need to re-examine your life choices.
In the grand scheme of Pokémon-related crime, Kubasta’s story doesn’t compare to, say, the scalper who just flat-out assaulted another collector at a Target store earlier this month, after the collector and his girlfriend objected to seeing the scalper fill an entire shopping basket with cards, despite the store’s two-pack-per-person limit. It isn’t even the most embarrassing story involving a man in his 70s: that honor goes to the 77-year-old school volunteer who somehow ended up in a physical fight with a 10-year-old over Pokémon cards.
But I don’t know; just look at Kubasta’s face. What are you doing, Kent? How did it come to this? Please get your act together, man. And don’t stalk any more delivery drivers.
